1. Long, long before you could Google someone, you could find out every detail of their life if they lived in a small town simply by existing. You don’t have the choice to Google or not to Google, you already know the good, the bad, and the ugly.
2. When you try out the trends you see on the internet, or, let’s be honest, wear something more than a “fancy sweatshirt” out people ask you why you’re so dressed up.
3. Sometimes you need to call a friend to give you a ride to the bar in the morning… because the bartender routinely drives you home as the town’s ‘taxi service’ is really just a somewhat unreliable guy with a van. Also, the amount of money you’ve spent on pull-tabs is really, truly embarrassing.
4. When you break up with someone, you need to be prepared to see them around town indefinitely. Even if you really don’t want to hear about them, people will give you unsolicited “updates” about what your ex is up to.
5. If your parents/family live in the same area you have zero privacy from them.
6. You’re haunted by the persistent subconscious anxiety of knowing that if you ever got seriously injured, the closest hospital is over an hour away.
7. If you’re single, at some point you are going to work your way through all the men in town and “run out.”
8. Going to “the city” is a big deal and you need to plan ahead of time to make sure you get all the things you can’t normally get in town: Chipotle, clothes from real stores, “exotic” groceries like kale.
9. You’re kind of stuck with the job you have because there are limited other options that don’t involve a really long commute. That’s okay though, you would rather enjoy life than worry about work constantly the way people who live in big cities do.
10. You end up spending a lot of money on gas without thinking about it not only because everything in town is 20 minutes away (at least) but because driving around is still a recreational activity, no matter how expensive it gets. You’ve had some of the best dates/nights of your life getting into a car and not really ever going anywhere.
11. When traveling, you need to deliberately remind yourself that you have to follow the laws like driving the speed limit, wearing a seatbelt, not riding in the back of an open truck, etc. You also forget what it’s like to get carded or have clerks check you out without asking you for a life update.
12. In summer on the nicest days you have to drive with your windows up because you don’t want to get all the dust from the dirt road inside your car. It’s impossible to clean.
13. Your life dream would be for your town (hell even the next town over) to miraculously get a Target. You know this will never happen.