13 Signs You’re The Black Sheep Of Your Family

  • 0

1. Your date (or lack thereof) is always a point of discussion among your family. Either you’re consistently dateless or your long string of much older/tattooed/otherwise inappropriate partners never fails to raise eyebrows.

2. You have a potty mouth. It’s one thing to talk about fucking and sucking over brunch with your bitches, and quite another to ask your friend where he came while you’re holding her nephew (true story). Even when you leave your world for your family’s it’s hard to suddenly develop a filter overnight.

3. Shots are your preferred alcohol delivery system.

4. You’re a male who doesn’t like football or a female who doesn’t jump into the “can I hold it?” line when someone shows up with an infant.

5. People refer to the year you weren’t able to attend the family gathering as “the tame year.”

6. The formerly fun loving people in your family who are now respectable adults (read: your “fun” aunt/uncle) address you with a smirk every time you say hello.

7. Your section of your parent’s Christmas letter is the shortest and includes at least one error about your life. It usually reads along the lines of “Chrissy is still living in the city and is an excellent babysitter for her nephews when they visit.” You realize I wrote a book this year, right parents? Meanwhile, your married siblings have lengthy paragraphs devoted to whatever it is that they do out there in the suburbs.

8. At some point a relative has disciplined a child by saying they don’t want them to “turn out” like you. Your name alone is a cautionary tale.

9. You receive a questionable amount of “suggestions” as gifts: an cigarette so you can quit smoking, a gym membership so you can channel your “colorful personality” into kickboxing and, the crème de la crème of passive aggressive mom gifts: an online dating membership.

10. No one asks you to bring a dish to share, they know you don’t cook–and even if you did waking up in time to drive to the party AND remembering to schlep something in Tupperware isn’t your forte.

11. At Thanksgiving dinner, you usually go a few rounds before your mom deems your “what I’m thankful for” item appropriate.

12. There’s a betting pool on what you’ll come up with this year as your annual excuse to skip midnight mass.

13. You never show up at a family gathering empty handed (unless you happen to know the host will already have a fully stocked bar they aren’t stingy about breaking into). TC mark

I asked women to be honest about their Instagram photos

“The essays in this book are short and sweet, and incredible. Love love loved this.” — Alex

“I’m so in love with this book! It’s so moving and some of the stories bring me to tears not because it’s sad, but because it’s relatable and shows that we’re not alone.” — Kendra

This is the reality of Instagram...
Powered by Revcontent

This is me letting you go

If there’s one thing we all need to stop doing, it’s waiting around for someone else to show up and change our lives. Just be the person you’ve been waiting for.

At the end of the day, you have two choices in love – one is to accept someone just as they are and the other is to walk away.

We owe it to ourselves to live the greatest life that we’re capable of living, even if that means that we have to be alone for a very long time.

“Everyone could use a book like this at some point in their life.” – Heather
Let go now
13 Signs You’re The Black Sheep Of Your Family is cataloged in , , ,
  • http://astringaroundmyfinger.com/5-prompts-for-memoirists/ 5 Prompts for Memoirists | A String Around My Finger

    […] Think your family is too above board to have a black sheep? Then a.) maybe you shouldn’t be writing memoir, and b.) Uh oh. […]

blog comments powered by Disqus