Date A Girl With An Eating Disorder

Gianni Cumbo
Gianni Cumbo

People on the internet are really upset about a viral article titled 5 Reasons To Date A Girl With An Eating Disorder which impressively is actually worse than it’s title.

I read this before it was viral because I read a lot online and I’m fascinated by the Return of Kings bros. Like, how they are actually people producing what seems to be sincere content that is so hateful and shallow?

Funnily enough it was through my own eating disorder-related therapy that I learned its basically impossible to be a person who thinks hateful and shallow thoughts about one group of people without also thinking hateful and shallow thoughts about yourself. Conclusion: these dudes are on a massive internal bumwave.

I support the ROK website, because I’d like to be fully aware of the world around me. If they weren’t writing these thoughts, they’d still be thinking them–and with less feedback about what’s wrong with it. Lay it all out there, that way I know who to avoid. I don’t want people to put on a show of a personality I find more palatable, only to slowly discover their real thoughts.

And to the issue at hand–there are way more than 5 reasons to date a girl with an eating disorder (even if you don’t have what I’m sure Return of Kings consider the ‘right’ kind of eating disorder) because men and women with eating disorders are, you know, actual people who deserve love like everyone else.

If you’ve spent any time browsing the Return of Kings site (hint: they’ve also written 24 Signs She’s A Slut) you can see the hate and vitriol they seem to have for women. When you have an eating disorder, it’s like having those feelings for yourself. I think, for our generation, this is the real struggle–learning to love yourself. You inevitably treat others how you treat yourself and someone who has known what it’s like to actively not love themselves would not wish that feeling on anyone. It puts petty drama in perspective–is it worth making your partner feel that unloved feeling you’ve experience just to one up them in an argument? Probably not.

This isn’t the point Return of Kings was trying to make, but if you want a happy, healthy relationship finding someone that’s either aware that self-love is the right mountain to spend your time climbing– or has already spent a lot of time and energy working on, is a great place to start. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

Related

More From Thought Catalog