Thought Catalog

‘Sassy’ Is A Weaker Way Of Describing A Strong And Opinionated Woman

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Shutterstock / Kaponia Aliaksei
Shutterstock / Kaponia Aliaksei

I have a problem with the word sassy.

I think it means opinionated. I think it means purposeful and strong and unapologetic.

I don’t have a problem with any of those things.

Except sassy is only used to describe women’s strong, valid, unapologetic opinions. When’s the last time you used sassy to describe a man?

For some reason, we can’t look at a woman who dresses boldly, expresses her point of view unapologetically and doesn’t take shit from anyone and just label her as a strong woman. No, she must be the stereotypical sassy. Because god forbid a woman with such caliber be intimidating or powerful.

I have a feeling that the idea for the word sassy came from someone not knowing how to deal with something a woman said, something a woman did, or something a woman wore. At some point, someone looked at her and said, “Most women aren’t like this. We need a word that will weaken all these powerful traits she embodies.”

It is so uncommon for a woman to be able to express herself in a strong, deliberate way without apologizing that we must label it sassy when she does so. Everyone must know she is not speaking fearlessly; she’s merely being sassy. As soon as we sparkle the glitter that surrounds sassy onto her, it takes away the truth of what she truly is. Bold. Strong. Confident. Unapologetic. Aware. Opinionated. Powerful. Influential.

We spend so much time apologizing for things as women that when a woman dares to not apologize, she gets labeled sassy. What sassy really means is: this woman just said or did or wore something daring and didn’t try to apologize for it.

And that is so uncommon that we had to invent a word that would feminize and sugar coat and undermine those actions so we could be comfortable with them.

And that’s bullshit.

I’d rather be an opinionated, purposeful, strong and unapologetic woman over being sassy any day. TC mark

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This is for the women who are first to get naked, howl at the moon and jump into the sea. This is for the women who seek relentless joy; the ones who know how to laugh with their whole souls. The women who speak to strangers because they have no fear in their hearts. This is for the women who drink coffee at midnight and wine in the morning, and dare you to question it. This is for the women who throw down what they love, and don’t waste time following society’s pressures to exist behind a white picket fence. The women who create wildly, unbalanced, ferociously and in a blur at times. This — is for you.

“When Janne has a new poem written, I shut my life down to do nothing but read it, and then when I turn my life back on, everything is better.” — James Altucher

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