The Perks To Visiting Home In College
1. Moms. (This has pros and cons all its own, but for now we’ll leave it as a perk.)
2. Your puppy (or maybe you’re a cat person). No one can cuddle, kiss, or love you like your puppy… not even the love of your life.
3. Real. Food. No dining hall. No finding the cheapest thing on the menu when going out, or conserving water bottles like the zombie apocalypse is happening.
4. Your apartment or dorm will always be restocked with everything your parents could possibly find in your house to give to you while loading up your car.
5. For two seconds you are the favorite child — only two seconds though, and then it goes back to your younger siblings.
6. That one dress or game or whatever it is you’ve been dying for… it can be yours with strategic planning on casually mentioning it and ironically being in close proximity to it.
7. Your family is going to ask you if you’re eating enough, and your mom and grandmother are going to make a big deal about how skinny you look. Yes, this could be a negative, but let’s not kid ourselves, after that conversation you feel like a model and are ready to take on the world.
8. Coffee. This is a big one. At your apartment, you have your Kureg; at home, you have the coffee machines of all coffee machines that makes the best coffee in the entire world… and there is creamer, of all flavors, that you do not have to worry about running out of because grocery shopping actually happens in this alternate universe known as home.
The Challenges To Visiting Home In College
1. Margarita night is not recommended, as Mom is not a huge fan of the effects that tequila can have on your life.
2. You have to forget to mention that when this hilarious story that you are telling happened that you were drunk, or that your friends were drunk, or that alcohol exists… which makes your parents question your college education.
3. Packing… especially if the process of getting home requires any sort of train, bus, or plane.
4. Unlike your roommates, your parents ARE going to speak words to you before 9am and before you’ve had your coffee… and they actually expect you to answer.
5. You actually have to get dressed so your parents don’t think you spend your life in your sweats.
6. “So you broke up with your boyfriend?” But that was for two weeks and now you are back together… This is a concept your parents will not even begin to understand. So instead, your significant other is referred to as your ‘friend’…and you’ll roll your eyes until they realize you are not breaking up again anytime soon (at least for another month).
7. Homework gets a million times more difficult to do. This is something I will never understand. Somehow you find yourself making lists about being home instead of writing your English paper.