When someone has anxiety, their brain literally doesn’t stop working. They overthink every little thing.
They attune themselves to the tiniest detail and make sure everything is perfect but nothing ever is.
They cling and become super clingy because they’re afraid to lose someone who already means so much to them because they’ve been left so many times.
They end up crying in their room alone, curled up into a ball, staring at their phones and wondering where they went wrong…
It’s a cycle you see. They fight and fall then they fight and fall. Fight and fall… fight… and fall.
And eventually, they end up being destroyed.
They end up losing a part of them because they so badly want to please you.
They give up the part of themselves that makes them human. They just kill off that part of them.
They stop texting… well they try to stop because they don’t want to lose you.
They change who they are because they’re scared… what if this time, they actually leave… what if this time they find someone better?
Thoughts just run through their heads and they make up these scenarios that probably won’t even happen but they just fall apart.
Loving someone with anxiety isn’t easy… but I hope you know it’s worth it.
I hope you know that I would go through hell and back for you…
That when I cling to you it’s because I don’t want to lose you because everyone I’ve ever loved has left.
That when I don’t understand why you’re busy, it’s because people who said that before ended up meeting someone else and pulling away.
That when I text you a million times a day, it’s because the voices in my head are screaming at me that you hate me.
That when I call you, it’s because the voices in my head are telling me you’re with someone better and you don’t want someone as clingy as me.
That when you text me, the voices stop talking.
That when you say you love me, I get chills.
That when you hold me in your arms, I feel at home.
That spending time with you is the best feeling ever.
That seeing you smile makes my day.
That hearing your voice makes my demons go away.
That seeing your name on my phone is my happy place.
That when I say I love you… I mean it.
That all I need is for you to give me a little bit of affection.
That all I want is a once in a while text saying you miss me.
That all I really need is for you to understand why I’m like this.
That all I ever really want in life… is you.
That you are the only person who makes it all better.
So please don’t leave.
Please don’t hate me.