There are times in our lives when we have to bite our tongue because we do not have a positive state of mind. What we say has a ripple down effect on others. It always will. That’s who we are and that’s how we are wired. No matter how hard we try to hide our emotions whenever we are justifiably or unjustifiably criticized, those emotions do exist beneath the surface. It doesn’t matter how long you hold a poker face. But it is important to express how you feel even if it makes you or others uncomfortable.
If you trust that others in your life are strong enough to handle you at your worst, then you shouldn’t worry too much about how you express yourself when you are distressed. Vulnerability should be promoted and highlighted more in life. A lot of honesty comes from distress. Although we tend to exaggerate our emotions when we are upset, we do say what we feel. A lot of people are so focused on trying to look strong and look for the right words that they simply ignore that they’re repressing their true feelings and emotions.
I wouldn’t recommend expressing yourself in any setting or any situation. There are times and places where we should keep our composure and not allow our emotions to get the better of us. But in moments where it’s okay to be vulnerable, we should be. We shouldn’t allow others to get away with their behaviors and attitudes towards us. That doesn’t mean that people are trying to hurt you. When people are being a little hard on you, they may not even know how they are coming across. If we express ourselves in these moments, it can help others realize that maybe they were coming across as aggressive or a little demeaning.
The best versions of ourselves is when we are not afraid to express how we feel. The best people to have in your life are the ones that will let you express any anger or frustration and won’t shame you for it. Holding in anger is kind of like boiling water. Once it hits it’s boiling point, you know it’s hot enough. When you hold in anger, you keep that water boiling. In doesn’t do you any good. Be expressive when you feel distressed toward people you know can handle you. Releasing anger to the wrong people will be seen as dramatic, but to the right people, it’ll feel therapeutic.