Men are often viewed as strong human beings, sometimes even mistaken as indifferent. Some also believe the notion that they only show their vulnerability when they’re drunk. It’s just a bit unbelievable — how they can suppress all the feelings they have inside?
I only realized how true this could be when I met you.
You had this strong aura, the typical “darling of the crowd” vibe. You never noticed it, but all eyes were always on you. You never realized how attractive you are, no matter what you do. Even when we became friends, you never believed me when I told how much you affect people and how incredibly alluring your whole being is.
I thought you were just being humble, but no – I found out that you never really considered yourself as someone “interesting to befriend” or someone “striking and smart.”
We had this instant connection – we became close. Later, you began opening up to me, and I, to you. We shared secrets we never dared tell anyone else. We eventually became each other’s confidantes.
I found out that your anxiety was the reason why you didn’t believe others when they told you they genuinely cared for you. You tried to shield yourself from the impending pain that you assumed would come, especially when they realized how “complicated” you are.
You were consumed with the idea that no one would take the time to know you – the real you – because you’ve always anticipated that they will lose interest once they do.
But that’s not what I saw when I met you.
I saw how loving you really are. You are full of love; it’s overflowing. And that came from your family. You are treasured beyond measure. I hope you always remember that.
I felt your genuine concern for people, how you liked to help others in times of need, and how you’ve always wished for them to never experience the same things you did.
And I also saw how your demons tried to eat away your happiness and joy – how you isolated yourself when you suddenly felt loneliness creep in. But I never left your side – rather, I stayed closer, hoping you’d somehow realize you were never alone because you’d always had me.
You don’t have to fake it with me – I genuinely care for your well-being.
For you, I am willing to listen to all your fears and doubts and try my best to let a bit of sun shine on you, to make you realize you deserve so much better than you think, that you are more than what your anxiety tries to tell you.
And no matter what happens, no matter how much you try to push me away because you think you don’t deserve love, no matter how noisy your mind becomes because of your anxiety, I’ll always try to calm your storms – I will always assure you that you are never alone.
But most importantly, I’ll still love you anyway.