Before she had experienced betrayal, she was a cheerful girl – simple things made her smile and she was approachable to everyone she met. She loved the color of the sky, the radiant sun, and the wind that brushed her rosy cheeks. She was a lover of all things encompassed in this world – she was a lover of life.
Before her family told her that she had to strive better to become number one and surpass all the other students in her school, she was friendly – she stayed late in school just to hang out with her friends, to play games, and to have a glimpse of her childhood crush who was pretty good at basketball. Oh, how her heart flutters each time she saw him smile.
Before she opened up her heart to all she deemed worthy, she was kind-hearted – she never doubted anyone’s intentions in getting close to her, but rather she welcomed each with open arms, trusting that no one will be wicked enough to give bring her pain; she was kind and considerate.
Before her friends turned their backs on her, she was sure that all the people who surround her will never do her harm – she was convinced that everyone who smiles at her and compliments her will never talk bad things behind her. She was trusting and unquestioning – naïve to the fact that the world is indeed a cruel place.
After all these nuisances, she became elusive – she learned to put her guard up and walls so high that no one could be capable of breaking them down. She became the kind of person whom she was afraid to meet on the streets.
“All I ever did was love purely, how come they have still managed to hurt me? Do I deserve this pain, am I unworthy to receive the trust, care, and affection that I poured on them?”
She was torn, ripped, and shattered in unexplainable ways.
She never imagined she’ll experience all the things that happened to her.
Her eyes, piercing and intense, emitting questions and doubts whenever you come close to her.
Her touch, cold and unwelcoming, conveying that she has already made herself taciturn; that it shows even on her skin.
Her smile, fake and forced, showing that she can tell lies through her kissable lips, but never mean anything she says.
And her heart, fortified and shielded, afraid that the wrong ones would dare touch it again.
So no, she’s not being too choosy, demanding, or hard-to-get, but rather, she has learned so much from the past that she has finally become erudite when it comes to prioritizing herself – mastered the art of knowing her worth and showing others her real value and significance.