You relentlessly chase after people that don’t care for you. You run after them after they’ve hurt you, pleading for their apologies but ending up offering your own in an attempt to make them love you. You’re running around after all these people, grazing your feet, and hurting your heart, all because you’re terrified of being alone. The thought of being alone petrifies you so much that you’d rather desperately cling onto the people that are tearing you apart.
Stop allowing these people to dictate your worth and value. You so desperately want to see the best in them—it’s both a blessing and a curse, but you must learn when it’s time to walk away and use your love for your own heart instead. Most importantly of all, I beg you, stop agreeing with the people that are offending you in the hopes that it’ll make them like you. It’s not worth it, baby, you’re never going to convince them of the lightness within your soul when they’re focused on painting it with the blackness from theirs. The names they call you keep you up at midnight, crying more salty tears than all of the water within the oceans, yet you welcome them with open arms and a kind smile drawn across your lips. Holding back your thoughts, you allow them to stomp over your beautiful being because you’re afraid of upsetting them. You handle their feelings with the same delicateness that they’re laughing at you for.
You turn around and smile at these people as they’re stabbing you in the back and tell them that it’s okay. You go as far as apologizing for getting blood on their knife and offer to clean it up. Filled with shame, you wince as you ask them if they’d be able to stitch the wound up, apologizing once again for taking up their time. These people, the ones that you’re begging to repair you are the people that are tearing you apart. Stop giving your power away to them.
Listen, baby. I love you, and all I want is for you to be able to love yourself with the awe and wonderment that you aspire toward. It’s horrible to watch you wearing yourself thin, picking yourself apart until your skin is frayed and your bones are crumbling. I see you racing around, so desperate to do more, be more. You’re in a constant state of worry that your more isn’t enough, fearful that it might not ever be enough.
Don’t you understand? You are enough, you always have been, and the day that you recognize this and feel your strength is the day that they can no longer hurt you. Their power will finally crumble, for it is built upon the bodies of the people that they’ve torn down. Your power, my darling, is built in the strength that it takes to pick yourself up and walk away. As soon as this power is unleashed, you will be unstoppable.
Your power was never meant for anyone but you; it will all become so obvious to you soon. The infiniteness of your worth will be unmasked, and you will realize your value, allow yourself to feel it, and watch it grow. Remember who you are and what you are – you’re a human being that deserves love and respect. It’s okay to have boundaries and it’s okay to stop allowing people to walk all over you – you weren’t born to be pushed around, that’s not your purpose here. Stop allowing it to happen.
Better days will come for you, I promise.