This Is How The First Girl I Fell In Love With Truly Broke My Heart

Ian Espinosa

Honesty

I fell in love with her during my junior year in college. My love sparked out of nowhere, still to this day I don’t know where it came from. We went through a lot of obstacles such as timing, friendships that we didn’t want to burn, and a whole basket of issues. These issues were obviously too big for us to ignore, which led to a very unstable relationship.

Apart

As we began to drift apart and go our separate way, I constantly felt something missing in life. I wasn’t able to put my finger on it at first but, eventually it all clicked. I missed her. I missed arguing with her, the smell of her hair, the way she laughed, and even the way she walked. But, there was a reason for all of this.

Realization

I realized that the reason I missed her was due to the fact that we were apart. The distance created a false sense of love. By not being her side I suddenly missed her. What was once something that annoyed me became something that I was attracted to. But the distance was necessary. After going through the struggles of being apart I realized that we were actually different. Politics, interests, dreams, aspirations, passions, hobbies, everything didn’t line up. The worst of all I wasn’t myself around her, instead I adopted a fake persona when I was around her. I was my genuine self.

Closure

From my struggles I learned that sometimes some people aren’t meant to be together. Instead you have to pick yourself up from your bootstraps and tie those laces and move on. There is plenty of fish in this wide open sea. You should never compromise your sincerity, once you do that you are no longer genuine. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

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