Since moving to Los Angeles and becoming a more active part of my Internet famous older sister’s life, I’ve gained a bit of a following on social media. It mostly consists of people who want to see pictures of my sister and what she is doing, which I know for fact because when I don’t upload a picture with her in it, I lose followers. But I’m fine with it, it doesn’t really matter either way to me, but it is quite humorous to see what people comment on my pictures or the responses people tweet back to me.
One of the comments that is specifically popular on the Internet is #goals. It can be friendship goals or relationship goals. Honestly, whatever you want can be added to it. I’ve noticed lately that a lot of my sisters fans who comment on my pictures use the term #sistergoals pretty damn often. At first, I wasn’t sure what people meant by it. Do they want to be our sister? That’s a little strange. Or do they mean that they want to be more like us with their own sibling? That’s a nice idea I guess, but still feels bizarre to me every time I see it.
While my sister and I are very close now, it wasn’t always that way. We haven’t lived in the same city as each other since we were kids and that was something we both had to adapt to. Moving out to LA, I knew having my sister here would be a good support system for me as I made this big change. In the last few years of college, she became my go-to person for every life issue, whether she was near or far.I want people to understand that it took years of work for us to attain this wonderful relationship we enjoy today.
Some of these comments got me thinking, is there any way I can help other people have as solid of a relationship with their sibling as my sister and I do? People differ in all sorts of ways, personality or values, which makes this a hard subject to work with. So here are my thoughts from my own personal experience.
Obviously because you are blood related, you have some sort of bond. But if you want more from your sibling it requires you to go further than just hoping they can become more comfortable discussing their issues with you. You must also do the same. You must also be willing to open up and trust that no matter what the response is, they have your best interests at heart. It takes both people to make a relationship work in any aspect, especially this one. I have become a much more open-minded person through my sister and her various personality quirks and she has learned other life lessons through me. Even if you are extremely different people, it doesn’t mean that you cannot find common ground and topics to discuss that mean something to you both.
So where do you go from here? Start with something small. If you and your sibling aren’t close, find a television show, or a book, or even a current event that you know the two of you can discuss together. My sister and I started getting closer when I started getting into comedy. I watched 30 Rock for the first time and started texting her quotes from the show that I thought were hysterical. It was something so small but it started bringing us together as people.
Becoming closer with your sibling can be easy. It can also result in a friendship you never dreamed of having. It gives you a person who you can go to no matter what the situation is, good or bad. I always knew how important this relationship was in my life, but what I didn’t realize was that other people could see how close we had grown as sisters.
So if you’re commenting #sistergoals because you want to be more like us with your sibling, know it wasn’t easy, but it can be done. The outcome can bring you so much joy in life, just knowing that this person will always have your back and be able to help you through the tough parts of life. It can be the most important relationship in your life, you just have to find a way to make it work for both of you.