To The Girl That Won His Heart

Jonas Svidras

I’m not going to lie. I hate the fact that you even exist. I hate the fact that there is another girlfriend after me, but I refuse to get in the way of his happiness anymore. I no longer made him happy, so I am glad he found someone that makes him happy.

I’ve been trying to compose this message to whomever this may be since the very day we broke up. I’m in tears writing this, but I want to give you my blessing. He picked you for a reason. He knows what he wants and when he wants it. He doesn’t just pick girls to be his girlfriend randomly. He chose you because he knows you would be right for him. I was the exception. He doesn’t throw his heart around for just anyone. In fact, he’s very guarded until he finds someone that he feels comfortable to open up with. And that girl is you.

It was never me. It’s apparent that he and I were far more destructive than good, and we were not meant to be together. It pains me to say that, but I am smart enough to understand when two people simply do not fit.

That does not mean I didn’t love him, because boy my heart beat solely on his existence. I’ll always love him, and by loving him I need to recognize that his happiness is all that matters, and me no longer being in his life makes him happy, then so be it. It may kill me, but eventually I’ll move on.

He chose you. Which means that obviously you are a good, loyal, woman that he knows is good for him. Don’t let him down. He knows how to be the most loving man in the world when he wants to be. And I have no doubt in my mind that he would be with you. You’re special you see?

That man deserves someone good for him. Someone that motivates him to go to the gym (because he feels discouraged when he doesn’t go), someone helps him with his schoolwork, someone he can talk to about his day, someone who has no problem laying a couple beers back for him; someone like you.

You see, I know you’re going to make him the happiest he has been yet and I think that’s truly important. As much as I will always love that boy, I stopped making him happy. Things got messy with us, and I truly hope that doesn’t happen with you guys. I can’t stand to see him hurt, so believe me when I tell you, he picked you because he knows you won’t hurt him. He picked you because he knows you’re right for him. I have hope. Because I cannot give him the happiness and laughter he needs, I want someone else too. That someone being you.

Things you need to know about him:

He won’t tell you when he’s upset. He just doesn’t talk about his feelings, and that’s okay. He might with you, but I pushed him too hard to talk that he never wanted too. Just be there for him. When there’s something on his mind, he needs someone to comfort him – be that someone. If something truly bugs him about your relationship, he will eventually mention it to you (sometimes too late, but he will mention it). However, this could be different with you than I because I was never someone he saw a future with.

Motivate him. He loves to go outside and go to the gym. He doesn’t like to be locked up in the house all day, 24/7. It makes him stir crazy. Encourage him to go to the gym, because when he doesn’t he gets down about himself (which he has no reason too be, but that’s besides the point). Go to the beach with him, hang out with his friends and yours.

When he opens up, listen. I never listened. I argued and got defensive. Listen before you speak. He just really wants to be heard.

Spend your time apart. I know this one is hard because all you want to do is spend all day with him in the comfort of his arms. Trust me, those were my favorite days. But its important to spend your lives apart. Space is something we never had based on unforeseen circumstances, so when he asks for it, give it to him. I’m sure you’ll have no problem with that.

He’ll chase you. If you’re upset, I know he will do everything in his power to make sure you’re okay. That’s where we went wrong. He never felt the need to chase, because he never was truly in love with me. And that’s okay.

Be equal. You two are a team. Build each other up. Do not break each other down.

New girlfriend, do me this favor. Make him laugh and make him smile. Be the best you ever could with him. Give him your all. Because he deserves someone his family will love and that he will love. He deserves someone like you. He picked you for a reason. He’s special and he will love you like no other. He will go to the end of the Earth to do things for you. Let him do it. Because if I were you, I’d jump at that opportunity.

So this is my blessing to you guys. As it pains me to stay, I wish that you can be something that I could never be to him. But don’t you dare hurt him. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

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