10 Things Everyone Needs To Know About Breakups


1. It’s alright to break up even if nothing bad happened.

A lot of times we wait until something terrible happens to break up with someone. I recently broke up with a boyfriend, and for the first time, it was before someone cheated, before someone did something unrepairable. At first it was hard because I had no solid reason to feel anger and resentment, which I really could have used to get over him, but in the end we were able to both move.

2. Unfollow them.

You don’t need to see what he’s doing and who he’s seeing. As soon as you break up, unfriend him from Facebook, unfollow him from Instagram, remove him from Twitter and say goodbye to whatever the fuck else he’s on.

3. Sweat out your emotions.

There were a lot of nights I spent feeling sad or anxious after my break up. Until I joined a gym. Once I started pouring my pent up emotions onto the treadmill I started feeling empowered and in control of my emotions. Of course there are those emotions that just sneak up on you but whenever they do grab your sneakers or yoga mat and sweat that shit out. You will always feel better after. Plus, there’s the added bonus of getting in shape at the same time, which is a confidence booster and gets you ready for your rebound stage.

4. Don’t get wasted.

At least for the first month or so. When you get drunk, you’re going to think it’s a great idea to call your ex-boyfriend. That can only end in tears. It’s fine to have a couple drinks to take the edge off, but if for some reason you absolutely need to get drunk make sure you have your friends around to supervise your phone.

5. Feel your feelings.

Breaking up sucks – you miss him. You feel sad, angry, lonely, depressed and all that shitty stuff. But don’t try to keep yourself from feeling your feelings. Feel sad, eat chocolate, talk to your friends and your mom. CRY. CRY. CRY!!! Once the sadness is over, the day will come when you will wake up and your head will feel clear and that weird feeling in your stomach will be gone. If you allow the feelings to pass naturally, you’ll be ready to move on and you won’t bring fucked up baggage to your next relationship. HOWEVER! Make sure to treat all of the people around you with kindness. Just because you’re feeling like shit doesn’t mean they have to be treated like it.

6. Hang with your guy friends.

I think it’s something about guys’ testosterone or maybe just getting attention from a man that makes you forget about your ex when you’re with them. Also, they have other guy friends who they can hook you up with. However, if they start putting the moves on you it’s time to get a cab home. (Unless you’re into it.)

7. Help friends/family with a project you’ve been putting off.

My parents had been asking me to help them clean out the garage. After my break up I took a whole weekend and finally did it. Going to the dump and throwing garbage into a sea of trash can be really liberating.

8. Join some sort of online dating/Tinder/Coffee Meets Bagel/OKCupid app/site

Even if you’re not ready to move on, it’s helpful just to see that there are other guys out there. At first, a lot of them will gross you out and maybe just the idea of being with someone else will gross you out. You might delete it once before you’re serious about looking, but reinstall and eventually a cute boy will talking to you and you’re going to love it!

9. Don’t over analyze

There’s going to be plenty of things you can over analyze when you’re going through a break up. Texts and (he-said-this-to-that-person-kind of bullshit.) Rise above all of it and move forward with a positive clear mind knowing that all of that DOESN’T MATTER. It just doesn’t. It’s over, that’s all there is to it.

10. There’s only one way through a break up. FORWARD.

Don’t look back. You made the decision for a reason. Or if you’ve been reading this whole list thinking “I was the one broken up with,” know that you’re better off without someone who doesn’t want to be with you. Either way, you’re free now. Be confident in the direction that your life is moving and be good to those around you. Take care of yourself. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

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