7 Things That Happen In Your 20s That Feel The Worst, But Actually Make You Better

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1. Getting fired

Maybe it was justified (ok let’s be honest – it was justified) but it doesn’t matter to you the right and wrong of it, the truth is, yesterday you had a job and today you do not. It feels shitty because a) what the fuck am I going to do now and b) holy shit, I just got fired! It’s embarrassing and in the moment you feel like a complete failure, but you’re not! Everyone loses a job at some point in their life, so look at this as an opportunity to become more resilient and aware of the short comings you have professionally so you can start to change them for the next job.

2. Breaking up with someone

Again, it’s easier to rationalize this as a “it’s them, not me” type scenario. But pushing the blame aside, it’s still hard to tell someone who’s been in a relationship with you that it’s just not going to work out. There’s a certain level of guilt that you carry no matter what the reason was (unless you’re a cold hearted person, in that case you really need to seek professional help). But, having the courage to tell someone honestly that this just isn’t the right thing for you is learning how to be aware of your own needs and putting them first above all else.

3. Being broken up with

Who hasn’t lied in they bed all day contemplating where exactly things went wrong? It’s a rite of passage – and as much as it hurts, you learn a lot about yourself when you’re heartbroken. Like how to cope, how to self-soothe, and how to find happiness again.

4. Losing someone close to you

When you’re in your twenties you have a certain sense of immortality – and while you claim to understand the fragility of life by hashtagging everything #YOLO, it really hits home in a different way when you lose someone close to you — especially if they were young. It feels like death is looming everywhere, waiting to take anyone and everyone you love away from you. And yet, within this sadness, comes a new perspective on life. Maybe it’s not too late to become a world famous dancer, maybe you should ask that guy/girl out, maybe you just shouldn’t sweat the small stuff, because life is too short to ever sweat the small stuff.

5. Having a friendship fallout

Doesn’t matter if you were friends for 20 years of 2 months having a full on fallout with someone who use to drink with you, listen to you blabber on about things and was pretty cool to just do nothing with, is the worse. However, these types of blow up’s help us to discern between true friends and friends we’re better off without. True friends can have a fallout, then apologize, brush it off and move on – those other people, well forget them.

6. Being broke

You’re looking at you bank account wondering “where the fuck did all my money go?” Oh yeah, rent, Chipotle, that drunken weekend in Vegas, phone bill, insurance bill – dammit why can’t Netflix be a free service?! It can sometimes feel as if you’ll never get your head above water financially but being strapped for cash makes you resourceful, you learn how to stretch your last $20 into 3 meals and a bottle of wine (Thank you Trader Joe Gods) and most importantly you learn to appreciate your hard earned dough for what it is. A gift.

7. Being passed over for a promotion or dream job

Is there any worse pain than wanting something so badly and then not getting it? It can be pretty soul crushing when you see some of your other friends achieving success and life long dreams while you are’t exactly where you thought you would be right now. But being passed over for things is what builds perseverance. Maybe you didn’t get that writing gig you wanted, but having the ability to keep doing what you love, perfecting it, and paying your dues builds character and will always help you out in the long run.