1. Wearing things that are totally “unfeminine,” because you feel like experimenting with an interesting look you saw and being perceived as conventionally attractive is not the top thing on your priority list.
2. Choosing to wear a bandage dress to the club, even if you’re absolutely not interested in meeting anyone, because feeling sexy for yourself is more than enough of a reason to dress up.
3. Not texting creepy guys back who don’t take no for an answer.
4. Not responding to clearly copied + pasted opening lines on dating sites (that quickly turn into insults when you don’t respond).
5. Not laughing at sexist jokes.
6. Not laughing at unfunny jokes period, even if a hot guy is making them.
7. Changing friends over the years, and falling out of touch with former besties because life happened to take you that way.
8. Ordering another round, even though you should be in bed by now.
9. Reaching for another buffalo wing, another French fry, another plate of seconds. Eating until you’re full, and enjoying every second of it.
10. Not having a perfectly-organized closet or bedroom, and not having everything look Pinterest-perfect when you invite over guests.
11. Not wanting to invite guests over at all.
12. Changing clothing sizes, changing body shape, changing the space you occupy in a world that punishes women for daring to not remain 19 years old.
13. Having scars, or cellulite, or visible veins. Not being photoshopped in real life.
14. Being the kind of woman who enjoys both her career AND what she wears, because we are capable of enjoying and pursuing more than one thing at a time.
15. Prioritizing your career for a year, for a decade, or for a whole life.
16. Not wanting to get married.
17. Not wanting to have children.
18. Wanting all of those things, but not in the package we are told we need to have it. Not wanting the fairy tale wedding or the monogrammed baby room or the thousands of dollars spent on parties.
19. Swearing like a sailor, and making dirty jokes.
20. Having three dates in one week, because you want to keep your options open.
21. Not being a domestic goddess, but being a goddess of exactly what you deem important, because you know what you want to be good at – and the only person that needs to be happy in your life is you.