The 11 High School Classmates You’ll Run Into When You Visit Your Hometown

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1. The Homecoming King who definitely peaked senior year.

He has his homecoming sash hanging conspicuously in his college dorm and uses it as a conversation starter or a tool to impress girls. You will run into him at the gym, where he is wearing his fraternity letters and saying, “I gained the Freshman 15, but it’s all muscle — feel it.”

2. The Valedictorian who is just as successful as ever.

You will stop at the public library to pick up a Harry Potter DVD and she will be studying for finals, because Princeton seems to test after winter break.

3. The kid who now works at the grocery store.

You went to school with him since kindergarten and it never occurred to you that there would be a day when this ended. But there he is, bagging your groceries, and you feel a little guilty, so you try to bag them yourself before you have to ask him how life is.

4. The friend you genuinely miss, who went to school in California and whose life seems to be much more glamorous than yours.

You had a mutual understanding that you might not remain as close after graduation, but it always makes your day when you run into her at the post office — or when you creep on her Instagram and you see that Celine bag peeking out from under the brunch table.

5. The party girl who became an extremely focused, career-minded student.

She was known for going a little crazy in high school, the girl who partied with the football team as a freshman and introduced all of her friends to Mike’s Hard Lemonade. But she’s reformed now, telling all of her home friends that they need to make LinkedIn accounts and start networking.

6. The nerd who became the party girl.

She was the quiet Honors student, the only girl on the Mathletes, who didn’t go out on weekends and who nobody gave a second glance. A week into fall semester, your Facebook feed was littered with pictures of her holding three red solo cups (where there’s a will, there’s a way) and kneeled over next to a dirty toilet in a frat house. People use dramatic phrases like “downward spiral” and “who would’ve thought?” to describe her.

7. The kid who still thinks you two will end up together.

He sent you Facebook messages periodically throughout freshman year of college, asking if you’ve declared your major and how you like your roommate and if you want to grab coffee over break. You never grabbed coffee during high school and you have no desire to after, so you stealthily dodge his advances on your thrice-daily run-ins.

8. The kid who you still think you will end up with.

He is probably a best friend’s brother or a brother’s best friend but either way, he was your crush in first grade and he will always make you wonder what would happen if you hadn’t gone to college eight hours away. Then you will realize that nothing would have happened, even if you hadn’t gone to college eight hours away.

9. The kid with the Wall Street internship.

You will take the train into the nearest city for a day of shopping with your friends, and he will be wearing a suit and tell you about the crazy hours he works. It’s okay though; his boss is famous for writing stellar recommendations. You will feel inadequate.

10. The angsty guitar player who all of your friends made fun of you for having a crush on Junior year.

He now goes to an extremely liberal college in Vermont and Instagrams a lot of weed. You listen to all of his weird instrumental music on that sketchy sound-sharing website that is definitely illegal and see him sitting in the middle of an abandoned field while you’re on your morning run. You consider saying hi, but remind yourself that you have nothing in common and have never so much as held a cigarette.

11. The girl who was terrible to you.

You will see her at a local restaurant sitting one table over with her family. She will be texting under the table the whole time, and your high school insecurities will surface that she is texting her friends about you. She will order a Caesar salad, no dressing, croutons or cheese, and you will realize that she does not matter to you anymore.