Your little “save me” cues you do to your friends when a guy you’re not interested tries to talk to you/dance with you at a club. It’s so obvious.
Drawn on eyebrows. You look like a fucking; clown stop it.
28. A fake tan.
When you have applied an entire bottle of spray tan. You look like you got in the way of someone creosoting a fence, or fell asleep in your spaghetti.
How shitty you just were to our waitress.
Your boobs don’t change size from day to day, the amount of padding in your bra does.