Latest Posts

Santa’s Publicist

It’s not stubble, but it’s not a full beard either. I don’t know whether it’s coming or going. Do you live in Brooklyn or something? That could be a problem.

RIP MS Word Paperclip (1997-2003)

What I loved about Clippy was his or her resilience, loyalty, and the fact that s/he didn’t judge me when, early in ninth grade, I typed into the box that said “What can I help you with?” the words “My mom buys my boxers still. Is that OK?”

The Dark Battle Of Fiscal Cliff

A long, brutal winter that was the warmest on record had settled over the lands. Mothers were clutching their baby bjorns. Fathers were also clutching their baby bjorns, except they made an Adam Sandler movie about it.

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