0:02 This clip begins with Urkel volunteering to “break the ice” amongst the young gals and boys who are segregated, as was often the case at real life middle school dances and parties.
0:08 For a socially challenged nerd, this dude Urkel sure does have A LOT of confidence. If Urkel existed today, I feel like he’d mope around — head down, staring at the ground awkwardly, while stuttering anxiously when speaking – which he’d only do when spoken to. Not Steve though. He boldly grabs Laura and tells the DJ to “crank up the music” like a boss.
0:15 Here are the words spoken by Steve verbatim:
“If you want to do the Steve Urkel dance, all you have to do is hitch up your pants. Bend your knees, and stick out your pelvis, I’m telling you, baby, it’s better than Elvis!” Lame? Maybe, but still better lyrics than Soulja Boy’s.
0:30 Wait, I know Urkel just vaguely described how to do his dance but not well enough for these people to break out in a detailed, synchronized routine. Is there a reason they all know the steps or are we just going to chalk it up to meh, whatever 90s sitcom storylines? Yeah, we’ll just put it on unrealistic television stuff’s tab.
0:34 Also, there’s a beautiful, but completely unexplainable voice singing in the background. “DO IT. DO IT. EVERYBODAAAAY, DO THE URKEL DANCE!” Wait, what? Where? How? WHY?! I don’t understand how this voice existed but its presence is undeniable. If every uncoordinated, ridiculous jig I did came with mind-reading backup dancers and a vocalist encouraging partygoers to follow suit, I’d do a hell of a lot less wall flowering – I mean, wouldn’t we all?
1:03 Waldo’s friend Willie hates seeing Urkel’s success, so he spikes his punch with alcohol. You know, aside from quicksand, spiked punch was 90s television’s favorite thing to terrify us with. I was so sure I’d have run into one of those predicaments by now.
1:23 Cut back to Urkel and company killing it on the dance floor without a care in the world. Notice how Urkel’s voice is now heard singing, which essentially confirms that this is a prerecorded jam. So, apparently Steve secretly slipped the DJ a cassette with this catchy tune taped on it and this brilliance ensued. Regardless of if “The Urkel” was a premeditated attack, it’s still a better dance than the Harlem Shake, Gangnam Style, the Dougie, the Cat Daddy or the Wobble. If this had come out 15 years or so later, it would’ve been a YouTube sensation.
BONUS URKEL-ING!!!This is because I love you guys and couldn’t hold out extra footage. Here, from an episode of Step By Step is Urkel performing his brilliantly complex choreography. Enjoy.