1. The kinds of food they serve at breakfast are incomparable.
I mean, let’s get real: chocolate chip banana pancakes; cinnamon walnut pancakes; classic buttermilk pancakes; spinach and cheese omelets; bacon, egg, and cheese sandwiches; breakfast burritos; Nutella crepes; almond croissants; French toast; home fries; sausage swimming in maple syrup; scrambled eggs; eggs Benedict; eggs sunny side up; fresh waffles with fruit and whipped cream on top… If your mouth isn’t watering by now, you are seriously disturbed.
2. Irreplaceable TV personalities depend on it.
Some of the best characters on television would not be here if it were not for breakfast—take Walt Jr. from Breaking Bad and Ron Swanson from Parks and Recreation for example. Those shows would be nothing without those two supporting men, and those lads would be nothing without breakfast. Walt Jr.’s love of breakfast was so wonderful that it even went viral—how many references to his love of breakfast has the internet birthed? Many. There are memes galore, including a fake Instagram account for him, with the majority of the photos featuring his breakfast platters. Think breakfast isn’t a “manly” meal? Well, folks, think again! I mean, look at Ron Swanson. Look at him! He is the epitome of man. And what does he eat? Oh yes, that’s right: breakfast. He even has a poster of sausage and eggs in his office! So there.
3. A couple of great movies depend on it, too.
Let’s look at The Breakfast Club. The name “breakfast club” wouldn’t exist without the physical meal, so a different title would have been used. Just imagine the awful possibilities… The Early Morning Club? Lame! And what about the all-time classic, Breakfast at Tiffany’s? Even when he was writing his novella, Truman Capote knew that ‘Lunch at Tiffany’s’ just doesn’t have that same punch.
4. Breakfast will often draw the line between a one night stand and everything else.
In doubt about your lover for the night’s true feelings? Give him or her the breakfast confirmation test: if he or she has a strong reaction against getting some food the morning after, chances are, you aren’t seen as that special. But if your hook-up is up for some morning grub, then there’s a large chance that person likes you, or at least likes you enough to take some time out of the day to watch you devour a stack of blueberry pancakes. Unless, of course, your date is One Of Those who doesn’t really like you, but doesn’t want to pass up the delicious opportunity for breakfast either, so they go to breakfast with you but never call back.
5. Breakfast tastes great at any time of the day.
A lot of breakfast cuisine can be consumed not only in the morning, but also around noon, in the evening, and when you get those midnight munchies. You can’t say that for lunch and dinner food, though. A salad, for example, really only tastes good at two mealtimes out of three. So by that logic, breakfast wins! Breakfast: 1, other meals: 0.
6. Breakfast can be incredibly easy to make.
Nobody has to have a Michelin star to whip up some scrambled eggs and buttered toast. Even if you’re a total nincompoop in the kitchen, you can probably manage cereal.
7. Breakfast yields business opportunities.
Did you ever see The Office episode where Michael Scott proposes to make a cereal shack? Yeah, I would totally support that. I think that’s a superb idea. I’m all about Mike’s Cereal Shack.
8. Not having your breakfast is a great excuse if you’re having a bad morning.
If you come in to the office all grumpy and say, “I’m really not in the mood to socialize today,” everyone will look and judge. But, if you come in all grumpy and say, “Ugh, I woke up so late and haven’t eaten anything,” everyone will be forced to “understand” your dilemma, because even if they don’t eat breakfast themselves, they know all the evidence behind the value of a balanced breakfast. They will have to sympathize, you know, because of all those scientific facts.
9. It’s the one meal that really helps you contemplate.
During breakfast, your day is just beginning, and you can think deeply about all the things you have to do/things you want to do/things you don’t want to do. Breakfast is by your side as you figure out how to have a great day ahead. When you eat lunch, all you’re thinking about is how glad you are that it’s your lunch break. And when you eat dinner, you’re usually either enjoying it with other people, eating it in front of the TV, or eating it alone at some restaurant when the only thought running through your mind is that you should have brought a book. Breakfast provides the best thinking time, which is something we could all use more of.