This morning, I stumbled across an article, titled “10 Uncomfortable Signs You’re Actually Becoming The Person You’re Supposed To Be,” on Thought Catalog and, at first, I was really optimistic. An article that discussed how you know that you are becoming who you are meant to be. However, what should have been one thing was the complete opposite. I don’t want to make the author feel as though she is wrong, I just don’t think she’s anywhere near becoming who she’s supposed to be, and otherwise, she would have realized that the following ten points are so very far from how you are supposed to feel when you find yourself.
1. You do everything by yourself and feel isolated from others.
As an introvert, I feel comfortable doing most of the things I need to do by myself. However, extroverts may not feel the same way. Also, when you become who you are truly meant to be, you don’t feel isolated from others. In fact, if you’re anything like me, you don’t even really notice that other people are missing because you are so comfortable in your cocoon that you don’t rely on others to help establish your life.
2. You realize that you have some issues with yourself.
As you start to blossom into the flower you are meant to be, you will most likely realize that you – as a person – have some issues. However, it’s not this realization that implies you are becoming who you are meant to be. In fact, it’s when you are able to realize that these issues aren’t all that significant, or when you start to take control of the issues you can fix, that you start to develop into the person you are meant to be. Dwelling on your own flaws has nothing to do with becoming who you are.
3. You have a strong desire to cut off some unnecessary relationships.
I don’t think the term “unnecessary” was the correct one to use. I think that, when you are becoming the person you are truly meant to be, you have the confidence to step away from relationships that are holding you back. Additionally, you also have the tact to do it in a proper way – “cutting off” a relationship is not a healthy method for ending any friendship, romance or kinship.
4. It’s hard for you to trust people.
This point is just straight out wrong. Sorry, but I’m not sorry. As you become the person you are, you let your walls crumble and you start allowing yourself to trust, even though you know that the other individual could possibly hurt you. However, the idea of someone hurting you becomes less serious because you know who you are, you are happy with who you are, and if someone wants to treat you like you don’t meet their standards, then you are capable of acknowledging that you probably don’t want them in your life, anyways.
5. You always feel that your life is boring.
Part of discovering who you are truly meant to be is being happy with yourself. If you feel as though your life is boring, then you have some growing left to do. I can’t speak for the entire world, but I assure you that when I figured out who I am meant to be, my life became anything but boring.
6. You are too familiar with the feeling of sadness.
If you are who “you are meant to be,” you will not feel sad. You will feel at peace, confident, cocky, happy, and creative. Hell, your life will suddenly become the glass slipper that fits you perfectly. When you become comfortable and assured, the last emotion on your mind (unless you get dumped or something – because, unfortunately, that still happens) will be sadness.
7. You always feel like you’re running out of time.
This point is actually valid. As an adult, working a full-time job and going to school full time, I do feel like I am always running out of time. However, I don’t think this point has anything to do with signifying that you are becoming who you are supposed to be. Honestly, I think constantly running out of time is a fact of life.
8. You regret the mistakes you’ve made in the past.
Yes, I do regret not letting my walls down before now. Yes, I regret decisions I made as a teenager. However, as you walk along the path to self-discovery, you don’t spend a lot of time dwelling on what you’ve done wrong. Actually, you start spending time learning from past mistakes and moving forward, remembering the lessons you’ve learned.
9. You always miss your childhood, family, and your loved ones.
I think, as an adult, you miss your carefree childhood, yes. However – unless your family or loved ones have passed – you can always call them. I mean, I don’t see my family as much as I wish I did, but I don’t spend a lot of my time crying over the fact that they live four hours away. In fact, I kind of enjoy my freedom.
10. You feel lost, confused, and anxious about your future.
I think one of the most important parts of growing up and finding your true self is having confidence that everything is going to work out how it’s meant to work out. Do you still have a lot of questions? Yes, but you don’t sit there and worry or cry over it. In fact, if you really have anxiety or depression, you pop your happy pills (for those who are about to get super defensive, I’ve been clinically diagnosed with both and happy pills help, a lot) and move forward in life, having complete confidence in your ability to succeed because you finally know who you truly are and what you are truly capable of.
I’m honestly not sure what point the author is at in her life, but if she honestly believes that the previously mentioned points are signs that she is who she is meant to be, I think she needs to re-evaluate her life. When you are truly who you are supposed to be – not who society wants you to be – you are happy, not depressed and reminiscing about what could have or would have been.