You know all of those quotes and memes we spend hours lying in bed, scrolling through Instagram, trying to find? You know… the perfect, most heart wrenching and relevant quote that sends whoever hurt us or did us wrong, the most subtle yet sophisticated FUCK YOU attainable?
Yeah, stop doing that.
Stop looking for quotes and reasons and justifications as to why they did what they did. Stop trying to relate to these sad, hopeful quotes that always lead you to believe that if you let someone go and they come back, it’s true love. Because let me tell you something:
If they leave and they come back, there’s a 9/10 chance that they sucked when they left you. They went off to find someone else, that someone else realized they sucked, and the person who left realizes “Hey, that person was really great, my life sucks without them.” They come running back, sucking up to you, you take them back, and guess what? They still suck. They still have the same sucky character flaws and still do not value what you have to offer to the world. This person makes you think and feel that they could not live without you and that love they have for you is the sole reason for their return. When in reality, the love for the power they have over you is.
They suck the life out of you. And you let them.You beg them to. And being the bottom feeder of a human they are, they keep you in their pocket and save you for when they need you.
You know what else you should stop doing? Thinking that the reason they left was you.
You did not do anything wrong. You lived and you gave your best and it didn’t work out. Don’t think that just because you couldn’t be enough to settle them down, that there is something wrong with the way that you express the way you feel, the way you act or the way you love. Some people never settle down. Some people physically and emotionally can’t.
So, why blame yourself?
Why torture yourself by second guessing the things that make you a good woman or man and make this long list of all of the things you could have said or done differently? You couldn’t have said or done anything differently. Because if you had said or done anything differently, it wouldn’t have been natural. It wouldn’t have been you. And if you weren’t being you, you wasted your time from square one. If you’re main goal is finding someone you click with, you can’t adjust who you are as a person in order to become more compatible. That’s not how it works. If it’s not natural, you’re going to wake up one day and ask yourself what the hell you’re doing and you’re going to be heartbroken and bitter that they couldn’t satisfy your needs emotionally. But if that wasn’t the case and you were being genuine and the other person genuinely sucked, don’t let it harden you. Don’t think that being genuine is to blame.This world needs more of it and sometimes I feel the ones who cannot settle down, are either envious or intimidated by it, so they run. And then they crave it when it’s gone, so they run back.
Stop letting them run back. Stop holding out hope that there is still a chance. Stop looking over your shoulder. Stop giving them a safe haven when it’s dark and scary and when the fellow sucky people they choose to surround themselves with lack the ability to understand them the way you did. Stop looking for the good in them. Stop making excuses for their sucky behavior and stop accepting half assed relationships and half assed love. See the situation for what it actually is and stop thinking about what could have been, what it was, or what it never was. Stop watching your following feed on Instagram, stop checking their Facebook. They are gone. Stop asking why they are gone.
Delete their number. Delete their Snapchat. And let them stay gone.
Of course, it’s going to hurt. You’re going to be hurt and you’re going to be angry and because of their manipulative and sucky nature, they will do everything possible to pick up where they left off. Prepare yourself for them to be hurt and angry when you stop allowing such behavior. Stop pitying them. And most importantly, stop pitying yourself.
Love yourself more than you thought you loved them. Love yourself genuinely and love yourself kindly.
Do you know what sends the most subtle and sophisticated FUCK YOU attainable? Not finding quotes to say it for you, but living without them. Living genuinely well without them, at that. Do everything they would never do with you or could never do with you. Not out of spite, but out of self love.
Understand that they are never going to change. You’re doing the right thing.
They felt they could live without you. So fuck that.