15 Things I’ve Learned Post-High School

1. It is extremely unlikely that you’ll end up marrying your first love. Or your second. Also, boys have no desire for marriage as early as girls do. So don’t even mention it. 

2. You do NOT need to stay with someone who doesn’t think the world of you, doesn’t treat you with respect, or doesn’t make you a better person. If you’re in a relationship that causes you constant anxiety, it’s unhealthy. You WILL find someone better. I promise. So don’t be afraid to let go. 

3. Don’t try to stay friends (at least right away) after a breakup. It just. Doesn’t. Work. Period. In my experience, the easiest, least painful way to get over a heartbreak is to cut that person out of your life completely, even if it’s not forever. When you keep in contact with your ex directly following a breakup, you’re basically peeling a scab off over and over. It will continue to hurt and leave an ugly scar. Also, once you finally “break up” again, it will hurt much worse than the first time.

4. Happiness is absolutely a choice you make for yourself. Self-pity is not attractive, nor is it helpful.

5. Count your blessings. What you have is worth worlds more than what you feel is “missing”.

6. That being said, you don’t need a significant other to complete you. YOU are enough. You need to love yourself before you can expect someone else to. 

7. Cherish good memories, but don’t pine over them. Focus on making the present into future good memories. 🙂

8. Have faith in fate. You can’t try to control everything that happens in your life. Trust me when I say it NEVER works out the way you want or expect it to. 

9. Don’t try to control someone else or tell them how to live their life. Even if it seems clear as day that they’re wrong, people need to make their own mistakes in order to figure things out for themselves. If you love someone, accept their flaws and pray they find their way in the end. Be supportive, even if you can’t stand their boyfriend/girlfriend. Love is sacrifice.

10. Contrary to popular belief, there are other perspectives outside your own. Everyone has grown up living different lives, under different circumstances, learning different things. As a result, priorities among even the closest of friends vary immensely. Try to understand why someone thinks the way they do, instead of assuming they’re stupid. 

11. Good friends are hard to find. I’ve met so many people who have seemed like great people at first, but in my naivety I trusted them early on and ended up disappointed. I’m still surprised every time I find out a person isn’t everything I initially thought. This is why you need to cherish the real friends, old and new, and never take them for granted. 

12. Absolutely NOBODY is better than anybody else (except maybe rapists and murderers; they are shit). 

13. Be kind to all, ESPECIALLY those who are obviously struggling. And by that I mean the mean, cranky ones who seem to be that way for no reason. More often than not, there is a reason. Try to be understanding.

14. Make friends with your coworkers. They will make the most stressful days worth it. Even if you don’t love your job, you won’t mind going as much when it feels like hanging out with friends.

15. Be patient. And that doesn’t mean to be content waiting around. DON’T wait around. Live your life and changes will happen accordingly.