As a 34 year-old woman who does nothing but talk, think and write about being single, often times it feels like online dating is my only (read: last) resort. However, here are just a few reasons why I have no interest in doing it anymore — and maybe even ever.
1. After setting up a first date, I decided this guy seemed a little off and cancelled on him. He left me five voicemails in a row, the last saying “You are making me VERY. ANGRY.”
2. After going out with a guy twice, I told him over text I just wanted to be friends. He sent a wall of texts, including “I wasn’t interested in you anyway” and “No one will ever want to marry you or have kids with you.”
3. A guy I’d gone out with a couple of times called me on Father’s Day while I was out with my family and begged me to come over for dinner because he was upset about his ex-girlfriend.
4. A guy I’d gone on several dates with stopped contacting me after going to my birthday party. Five days later, I text a “?” and eventually, “Is this over?” To which he replied, “I guess so since you seem upset.”
5. I met up for a first lunch date with someone who talked about girls with “big titties” and claimed the worst quality a woman could have is not being able to walk in high heels. He suggested we hang out after the holidays where he’d “get me dolled up” so we could go “clubbing.”
6. I had a first dinner date with a half-Asian guy who said he only dates the “Top Three.” When I asked him what that meant he said, “You know, Chinese, Korean or Japanese,” and then proceeded to tell me how all other Asians were less than.
7. I met up for drinks with a guy who kept insisting we high-five.
8. I went back to the apartment of a guy whose “bed” was a twin-sized cot. (I didn’t stay long.)
9. A guy I had been talking with extensively and eventually met up with forgot to mention he was divorced. And the father of two kids.
10. A guy I’d been on and off again with for seven months stopped contacting me one day, started dating someone else, and never spoke to me again.