Darling, I know your heart is tired.
I know lately you’re tired of crying through sleepless nights. Of always hoping, waiting and wishing someone was out there to give you light. Not many people would understand the way we are – that is the most horrible thing. Not many people would want to know the stories behind our scars. And not many people would care, really. They have their own battles to face.
I can’t promise you that things would get better, nor will I ever tell you that you get to choose happiness. This is a lie. But what I’ll tell you is this:
You are allowed to be sad. You are allowed to be weak at times when you have to. You are human and you are flawed, and no one expects you to be full of bright positivity all the time. Maybe things would get worse, perhaps even heavier. But I know for a fact that all these will pass, and soon, you’ll wake up and realize your heart is strong enough to wither through its darkest nights.
I know the urge of ripping yourself apart is too strong, because the world gets too much to breathe in. The ones whom you could run to is never there for you in the ways that you need them, and the ones you used to trust have shattered all those bridges. Darling, these are some of the things that we simply can’t control in life, and whatever they did to you is not your fault. It is tiring, so very tiring, to not have anyone be there for you the way you were for them. Sometimes, people can be disappointing.
But there are some things that won’t let us down – your favorite song, the skies, the words you write. That cup of coffee in the morning, a hug from your pet, that playlist from Spotify. These are things that can make our days, no matter how little they seem, somehow bearable. And that’s okay, darling. It’s a lot better than blatantly talking to a wall and expecting a pair of arms to fall into in return. You get to choose how to heal and you get to choose what heals you.
So wipe your cheeks and hug yourself. Breathe. Today is simply a day. It would never pass through you again. Once you curl yourself up to sleep and wake for dawn, you can take comfort in the fact that you’ve survived your storms for now.
Darling, I know your heart is tired. But that’s okay.
Today is just another day.