7 Things You Need To Keep In Mind About The Guy Who Ghosted You

Franca Gimenez
Franca Gimenez

1. Do not contact him, even if it’s his birthday.

While he’s busy doing whatever he has and wants to do with his life, do not contact him. This will signal him you aren’t desperate enough to run after him. And even if it’s his birthday, if you’re special enough to him, he’d rather see and be with you – regardless if he was with his friends or not.

If he’s doing this to make you miss him, do not fall for the trap. You’re a fabulous woman, not a pet dog.

2. Do not greet him on special occasions. Let him be the one to greet YOU first.

Greetings are signs of formality. I think for me, it’s a way of expressing how much you long for that person on that special occasion. This may sound bitter, but if he can’t send you a simple, “Happy New Year too” text on New Year’s Eve, then don’t bother asking how he’s doing!

He won’t bother texting or replying to you at all.

Just shut it, and eat your banana cake.

3. Do not beg for him to reply.

Okay, I am quite sure you wouldn’t resist texting or calling him because as it puzzles you every day on how much you desire for a closure, you’ll still end up texting him at the end of the day.

It will make you so confused about what’s the real score between you, and there would always be that single hope in you that maybe one day, when he already thinks of replying, there would be a second chance.

Well, not this time.

If you’re important to him, and you were his priority, you wouldn’t have to beg for him to reply to you – regardless, again, for the reason.

Moreover, he wouldn’t go astray when you crave for his attention.

Begging him to reply makes you more desperate to him, and when he sees you so desperate and easy, you would appear invaluable and cheap.

Do not make him see you as a 50-cent candy on the candy store. You are a bar of To’ak chocolate for heaven’s sake, not a bubble gum on that cheap vending machine!

4. Do not stalk his Facebook and Instagram accounts.

So you’ve seen him posted a video on Facebook about something he thinks is funny. He also posted a recent gym selfie on Instagram about his daily work out.

You thought, “What’s in it with replying that he can ridiculously post videos and pictures in a day, and not reply to you in three seconds?” Even if you try to brush the idea off, he’s still isn’t as “busy” as you thought and presumed.

Annoying, right? I know.

It’s understandable that you miss him. Especially that he left you hanging without knowing what’s wrong. However, do not ever try to stalk his Facebook, Instagram, or whatever social media platform he has just to keep updated of his daily routine or agenda. It will just make you think and over-analyze everything. If he has time for other things and not have time texting you, then he’s definitely not into you.

Simple.

Do not create something that will make your head explode. Create something out of it, instead. I suggest you go to Church and pray for whatever you two are going through.

5. Stop Overthinking.

Being a victim of ghosting – where a man gives no explanation for his disappearance to the woman he’s dating – would probably make you overthink of your value. You’d constantly think being yourself was the reason why he was turned off, or should you have given him the kiss when he was asking.

Nope, nah-uh!

Do not ever overthink of your worth just because someone has disapproved of it, or you think you have been rejected of it. Being yourself is the most wonderful thing to do because knowing, loving and accepting who you are leads you not to the perfect person, but to the right one. If he can’t accept that, then TTFN. Bid him good bye already. A real woman goes on with her life.

Never underestimate that tiara above your head. You’re a queen. And if he cannot handle one, then he deserves a hoe.

6. Do not backtrack all his text and chat messages.

I know you’re wondering what went wrong.

You seem to read all the texts and chat messages you’ve exchanged from the past few days, and still wonder what went wrong.

Well, to tell you, it’s not because of a text.

And even if it does, he still didn’t man up to tell you straight in front.

When you back track his messages, it will only make you miss him more.
And when you eventually find yourself missing him more, you’d crave for his attention even more and start doing the aforementioned “don’t-s” above. No. Don’t. Just do the one and only “do-s” below.

7. Just. Move. Forward.

Moving on is hard.

I know, I know. Same old, same old.

But the thing is, even without that closure you were begging for, you have to.

To tell you honestly, he wouldn’t come back. And, even if he does, it wouldn’t be the same anymore. He missed out on everything. He wouldn’t come back to say sorry because he was too “busy” or he was just having a hard time thinking things through. Not to mention he isn’t Justin Bieber to ask if it’s too late now to say sorry. He also wouldn’t be sorry because he has a “personal” problem which only was because he was turned off with you not knowing the reason why, himself, too – presumably.

He won’t even talk to you about it, because he’d rather avoid the conversation if you try to argue with what he has decided to do, than settle with a closure. He knows it’s not going to end there; it’s just going to end up in an argument. He’s avoiding his conscience because in his mind, he doesn’t want to hurt you, even if he already did.

If he really was into you, or if he really does love you, he wouldn’t let you do any of those six things above. Moreover, he wouldn’t have a hard time “thinking things through” because he has to be sure about you.

Don’t let him treat you like a game. You’re not HangARoo who should be left hanging if he can’t figure you out correctly. TC mark

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