4 Things All Over-Thinkers Must Always Remember

Sex And The City / Amazon.com
Sex And The City / Amazon.com
When I was in first year of university, I took an introductory psychology class with my best friend. 4 years later, and 30 more important classes later, not a lot has stuck (something about a prison experiment, baby monkeys getting conditioned for something, some sort of fallacies…pretty much all a blur). However, there is one word that I will always remember being discussed, as it perfectly described the way that I had been thinking for my entire life: rumination. To ruminate is to continuously over-think about things that have happened in the past, placing emphasis on the negative and creating problems that aren’t actually there. This is me in a nutshell — some people worry, I ruminate. The latest episode of rumination happened last night as I was trying to get to sleep: that friend request that I sent must not have been accepted because of that thing that I said 6 months ago in passing, or because I am a shitty person and nobody actually likes me. I know that these things aren’t true, and that the likely reason my friend request was not accepted is because I barely know the person, but my mind doesn’t often work that way. Lately, for the sake of my mental health and well being, I have been trying my hardest to affirm that my thoughts are unfounded, and wanted to share my rumination affirmation with everyone else who is dislocating their brain with conspiracy theories.

1. Nobody thinks about you as much as you think about you.

I need to remind myself: I don’t even remember half of the things people said to me 10 minutes ago. Nobody is going to be criticizing the things that you have said in the past, even if they were actually as horrible as you imagine them to have been. Time fixes or removes a lot of stuff, so don’t let any uneasy decisions you made in the past dictate your future.

2. Talking with someone is better than talking to yourself.

When it comes to over-thinking, replaying the same conversation or thought process over and over in your head is a standard. Take the time to say what you are thinking out loud to someone you care about. There is something very final about spitting out what has been bouncing around in your head all night long, and speaking requires consciousness, which allows for the foolish things to finally identify themselves as foolish.

3. The bleak music isn’t helping anyone.

Sorry, but listening to “My Number” by Tegan & Sara is only making matters worse.

4. Getting outside and doing things helps, even though sleeping is easier.

I realize that this is way easier said than done, but if you have the 1 second urge to get out of bed, take that opportunity. My friends invited me to see a movie tonight, and despite not really being interested in seeing it, I still jumped at the opportunity because I knew it would help keep me occupied lest something else takes over my mind. My personal trick is to tuck in my shirt after I shower for the day — it makes me feel like I am important and should be outside of my apartment.

Over-thinking is hard. It’s hard on relationships, it’s hard on making friends, and it’s hard on you. Oftentimes excessive rumination is connected with preexisting mental health issues, so if it’s getting to feel like too much — like it’s dragging your life down — then seek the most productive help available. Just remember: nobody is too concerned with you, you are still alive, and people love you. That’s what I try to do. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

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