I don’t care how long it’s been off the air for; Sex And The City will forever be a classic. Carrie and crew have quite the lives going for them – and quite the friendship. Groups of friends talk, dwell and stew over the subject on the daily: which Sex And The City character would each of us be?
Three of my girlfriends and I had this debate once, loudly, at a sushi restaurant. As we tried to pinpoint who was who (no one ever seems to want to be Miranda), I realized that actually, we really are a lot like the Sex And The City ladies.
Besides having two blondes, a brunette and a redhead, we have the sass, the class, and the skills to kick ass that the girls seem to possess in every episode. These ladies have a loud, crazy, and absolutely fantastic friendship, and I’m honored to be able to compare it to the friendship I have going on with my own crazy ladies.
Even outside of this foursome, a lot of my friendships have similar aspects to the friendships portrayed in my all time favorite TV show. I think a lot of us channel Carrie, Miranda, Charlotte and Samantha in our own friendships even more than we might realize, in ways that we might not even notice. In a lot of ways, you and your friends are probably just like Carrie and the gang, too.
1. When you go out to eat together, you’re always by far the loudest ones in the restaurant.
There’s just so much to talk about and so little time to say it all in, and your voices seem to rise with each exciting story that gets told. Nearly every episode of SATC features the ladies loudly discoursing in various dining establishments, and it’s a stable of your group’s friendship as well. Waiters fear you and restaurant goers loathe you, but it’s never going to change. My friends and I once FaceTimed my family at our table in a previously quiet Chinese restaurant. Whoops.
2. You will randomly ask people to take pictures of your group with no shame.
You probably take a lot of snap videos and Instagram pictures, too. You’re those friends, it’s true, but you just can’t help it. You look fabulous, right now, in this place with this lighting in front of this tree. This picture has to happen right now. That’s the reasoning, and you’re all sticking to it. When Carrie and the girls are on a bus back from Atlantic City and ask the old lady sitting across from them to take their picture – that’s you and your friends. It doesn’t matter where you are. If the moment is right, it’s getting documented.
3. You talk about taboo topics loudly in public places.
And you’re probably never going to stop. When you and your friends are hanging out, you often forget that it’s not just the group of you existing in the universe – there are lots of other people around too, and they can hear you. Just as Samantha often makes crude declarations in the middle of coffee shops, you and your friends don’t really care what you’re talking about in relation to where you are. One of you did WHAT last night? You need new thongs? You need a new VIBRATOR? Oh, I’m sorry, we’re in public? My friends and I have played the “Adult Version” of the game Heads Up near a group of small children. You corrupt minds wherever you go, but it’s completely accidental, so it’s ok…right?
4. Personal space is not a thing.
It doesn’t really matter who lives in which apartment or in what room – you all sort of just make yourselves at home in every home that one of you resides in. You definitely have a pair of yoga pants lying on your friends floor somewhere, and someone’s apartment has been holding your lost flip flop hostage for quite some time now. Food is communal, couches and floors are for crashing, and like the SATC women have taught us, wine is for toasting (and sharing).
5. You know each other’s wardrobes.
You will often direct each other on what you want each other to wear for various events with this knowledge. When your friend asks you “What should I wear,” you can confidently tell her to wear that red skirt with the sparkly grey top thing she has, without looking in her closet. You’re just that good. Everyone else thinks you’re all creepy. The only time you don’t know about clothing taking up residence in your friends closets is when it’s new – and lets be honest, as Carrie often does, they probably showed it to you as soon as it came out of the shopping bag.
6. You fight, not because you want to, but because you love each other too much.
You get mad at each other because you want what’s best for each other, and when someone’s being an idiot or making bad decisions you just want them to cut it out. You know how amazing your friend group is, and if you have to get a little angry sometimes to remind each other of that, then so be it. Because there’s a group of you, you know you can complain about one person to another and then handle it together, as the SATC ladies do in practically every episode. Sometimes you get annoyed with each other just because you’re around each other so often – that’s how family acts, after all, and that’s basically what you are. Family.
7. Group shopping is a thing that happens a lot.
It doesn’t matter if none of you have the money or the time. Life is short, life is stressful, and life demands new clothes, or at the very least browsing for your eventual new clothes. Your friends are great at telling you when you shouldn’t buy something – and when you absolutely, 100% should. Carrie’s friends indulge her shoe obsession on the daily, and your friends fuel your irrational spending tendencies as well. Fleece-lined leggings in Florida? You were questioning it, but your friend says it’s a go, so they’re coming home with you.
8. You will talk about sex, and no gory detail will be left unsaid.
If one person is getting laid, the rest of you must live vicariously through her. That’s how it works. Current and past sexual escapades get talked about constantly, everywhere. The Sex And The City ladies never leave any details unsaid, despite Charlotte’s cries of protest, and you guys are the same. You’re eating? That’s fine, we can still discuss what you did with so and so last night. You can handle it.
Details of sexcapades must be dissected and discussed. No exceptions.
9. You support each other through all of the phases.
We’re young, and we’re all still figuring it out – your friends get that. Like when Samantha decided to try dating a girl and Charlotte decided to convert to Judaism – whatever you and your friends are going through, you support each other, whether you think it’ll last or not. Whatever the latest phase is, you stand behind each other 100%.
10. You’re constantly making fun of each other.
That’s what best friends do, isn’t it? Every time Carrie or one of the girls opens her mouth, another girl is ready with a witty joke at her expense. You know each other too well not to tease each other constantly.
You’ve seen each other’s most ridiculous habits and heard each other say the weirdest shit – it would be a crime not to use it all as material for hysterical jokes/Instagram posts/snap stories. I captured (and posted) a photo of one of my friends running through target wearing a banana costume, and it’s one of my proudest moments. No regrets.
11. You often find yourself on the craziest adventures.
The Sex And The City gang once barely escaped a bar fight and then got busted for smoking weed in front of a cop car, only to escape charges because the cop felt sorry for Carrie after hearing she got broken up with on a post it note. Sound familiar?
When you’re with people who you feel comfortable being your most ridiculous self with, you tend to get into the craziest situations. Every outing turns into some weird adventure that you definitely didn’t plan on, and none of you would have it any other way.
12. Drinking is never not an option.
“Of course you’re drinking,” Samantha will always say despite her friend’s protests. You and your group are exactly the same. “I’m not drinking tonight” turns into “Ok, ok, just one drink,” which inevitably leads to, “SHOTS, SHOTS, SHOTS!” Oof. If one person is drinking, suddenly, you’re all drinking. Friends that drink together, stay together – until you lose each other on the dance floor and meet up the next morning trying to figure out what the fuck happened last night. But hey, if all else fails, at least you’re still there to have hangovers together.
13. If ever you don’t tell each other something, it’s because you know the honesty is coming.
We all make bad decisions sometimes – and your friends are always the first ones to point them out. Carrie didn’t tell Charlotte she was having an affair with Mr. Big because she knew that Charlotte would tell her the truth about the situation, and Carrie wasn’t ready to hear it. As friends you tell each other everything – unless you know what your friend is going to say, and you just don’t want to face the truth yet. We can’t always bring ourselves to see the mistakes that we’re making, and our friends are always prepared to hold up the mirror to show us.
14. Your friends know more about your life than you do.
When Carrie and the girls are getting lunch, someone will say something and the other three will immediately chime in with “No way, remember when you did this!” They remember more about each other’s lives than their own, and that’s how it is for you and your group too. You can practically finish each others sentences, and it’s weird. No past hook up or weird outfit goes unremembered, and you’re happy to remind each other of exactly how you’ve chosen to live your lives.
15. You know that as friends, you’re not perfect.
Your group has its issues. Individually you’re all a little weird and screwed up. Together, it’s a hell of a lot. You know that none of you are perfect, together or apart. Sometimes you’ll get mad. Sometimes you’ll fight. So much of the time you’ll cry. You’re all going to make mistakes, individually and as a group – but you never have to go through any of it alone. Weirdness and all, you’re in this together.