The rules to dating are infinite. People have made careers out of being in a relationship experts. They write books, TV shows, movies, make entire practices out of trying to help people in their love lives.
The funny thing is, everyone buys into all these rules. They wait three days for a guy to call after their first date. They wait at least three dates to sleep with them. If the relationship does not work out, they expect a ring shortly after.
My boyfriend and I met on Tinder. At the time, I wasn’t too proud of that fact. But you gotta remember this was almost two years ago when it was predominantly used for recreational mating. Now we’re among the millions of people that the internet brought together. Big whoop.
We talked for two months before we even met in person. One day I packed my bag, drove three hours, and ended staying the entire weekend. Without batting an eye. And looking back on it now, I was fricken crazy. I still can’t believe I did that.
I pulled a Phoebe Buffay and did all the milestones in one night: met in person, first date, fist kiss, sex, and I met a majority of his friends.
I know that probably breaks every single rule of dating. Like literally every single rule.
But it worked for us.
We were able to get that stuff out of the way and focus on the important stuff. Like how he tok his coffee or his feelings about The Goonies. The real important stuff, ya know.
All that added pressure was taken out of the equation. It took the guessing game out of things like “How many dates before it’s acceptable to sleep with each other?”, “Is it too soon to introduce I’m to my friends?”, “When can I stop shaving because this shit is getting old.”
This tactic may not work for everyone. It just happened to work for us. And it’s not like we planned this meticulously either. It just… happened.
If you’re a bit skeptical, then that’s okay! I don’t blame you. Maybe following all of the rules and taboos of dating completely saved your love life and relationship. That’s great! If that’s the case then I’m so happy for you. The end goal is to be happy and in a healthy relationship right? So who cares how you got there?
I guess the moral of the story is: don’t be afraid to break the rules of dating. There’s probably a reason you’re breaking them, so don’t fight it.