Every day around 3 o’clock my dog, Felise, sits by the front door and waits for Brian to come home. She absolutely loves Brian! As soon as he opens the front door she grabs her favorite toy and prances around the living room, bidding him to chase her. She is so happy that her human is home and cannot hide her excitement.
Now, how I act whenever my husband walks in the front door differs depending on my mood. I always kiss him whenever he walks in the door but if I’m in the middle of cooking dinner I may rush past him so I can get back to the kitchen. If I’ve had a bad day then I let my attitude carry over into our evening. My sweet pup has learned a thing or two about unconditional love that I need to learn.
As women, our lives are ruled by our emotions and it’s very easy to selfishly consider your needs over your husband’s needs. But marriage isn’t about ‘me, me, me’ it’s about putting someone else’s needs above your own. I’ve written a little more about selfishness in marriage in the past.
While I may not act as silly as my dog whenever Brian walks in the door, I do need to slow down enough to show him how much each means to me each day by putting his needs above my own. This doesn’t mean that I always have to bend my will to his. Marriage takes two people who are there for each other. Someday I can’t handle the stress of life and it’s all on him to cheer me up. But in general, there are things that I want to do for him (and he needs from me) every day. In an attempt to be more intentional with this I have put together a list of six things that your husband needs from you every day.
Wives, understand and support your husbands in ways that show your support for Christ. Ephesians 5:22
You are your husband’s cheerleader! You are his biggest fan! You are the one person that he can count on no matter what. He is the one person in the whole world that you liked enough to marry and you must never forget that! So be his cheerleader and make sure that he knows that you support him.
As Christ has forgiven you, forgive each other. Colossians 3:13
Grace means so many things. It is by grace that God has saved us, forgiven us, and promised us eternal life. We don’t deserve grace but God gives it anyway. Since marriage is a picture of Christ’s love for His church, we can assume that grace is a big part of our marriages. There are days whenever marriage is hard and your husband is not your favorite person. On these days he deserves grace. Even when you think he doesn’t, he deserves grace. So extend grace to your husband every day.
Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken. Ecclesiastes 4:12
Whenever you pray for your husband (and with him) you are literally asking the creator of the universe to intervene in your marriage. That’s pretty amazing! Being a husband is not an easy job so make praying for your husband a priority.
Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind one to another, tender-hearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ’s sake has forgiven you. Ephesians 4:31-32
Your husband deserves to be treated with kindness. This can be as simple as taking an interest in what he is interested in, letting him speak before you jump to conclusions or a simple action like surprising him with a meal that he loves. In all ways possible soften your heart towards him and be kind to him. Everyone deserves a little kindness.
Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands. Ephesians 5:22-24
Like it or not, your husband is the head of your home and your spiritual leader. This means that you should respect the desicions that he makes for your family. This doesn’t mean that you can never speak your mind or that he can boss you around. Oh no! Respect goes both ways in marriage and he needs to love you and lead you in the way that Christ would have him lead. On a daily basis, this means that you love your husband enough to show him respect and you always attempt to build him up, not tear him down.
A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another. By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another. John 13:34-35
Your husband needs your affection. He needs your time. I know you are busy but I seriously believe in the importance of spending time together. Make a conscious effort to make time for your husband every day. Show him how much you love him and tell him that you love him!
You are the most important person in your husband’s life and you have the biggest influence on him.
Make sure that you take the time to give him the love that he deserves today and every day!