What It’s Like Getting Called A Bully When You’re A 20-Something

Flickr / Amir Aziz
Flickr / Amir Aziz

I find it interesting when folks who don’t understand certain situations jump in to defend the so-called “victims” of “bullies” when so often they get things twisted. But that’s the problem with the real bullies – they’re good manipulators.

I find myself in this position every so often when I share my opinion (which is almost always an unpopular one) on something or call people out on their bullshit. I would just like to know when it became acceptable to harass and belittle someone for expressing themselves? Now, I’m not going to go after the person doing this because there’s no point. They know exactly who they are, and the people who refuse to see that there are two sides to every story are the types who don’t want to understand in the first place. But don’t think for one second that I’m ever going to let that stop me from defending myself and letting someone know that it’s not okay to lash out at and belittle someone simply because they don’t agree with what you have to say. When I speak out about something I stick to my guns and I don’t back down from anything that I believe to be true. I’ll never enter into any sort of debate without standing by what I have to say. I’m also open to other opinions and points of view, but what I won’t ever tolerate is any kind of bullshit or cowardice, and when I do that I’m called a “bully.”

To make it very clear: Being called a “bully” doesn’t offend me or bother me in any way because I know I’m not one. Save that word for a time when you really need it. Save it for a time when your child is teased endlessly by his or her peers. Save it for when your teenage daughter receives threatening texts. Save it for when your son is physically assaulted for being gay. You don’t use it when someone is headstrong and speaks out about the things that they’ve endured, or when someone is responding to someone else’s response, thus having opened up a dialogue in the first place.

I’m not a bully. I’m just a 28-year-old woman who is sick and tired. I see your bullshit and I can call you out on it. I won’t let you get away with it. I don’t sugar-coat anything, and if you don’t like what I have to say then that’s not MY problem. Maybe you just shouldn’t put your crap out where I can find it.

The main reason I’m writing this is because I want people to know that they should never shy away from their opinion, because if you do that then you’re just shying away from yourself. You should always stand up for yourself and stand up for what you believe in. And most of all, you should stop pussyfooting around. Around issues, around people, around ideas, and around yourself. Be proud of the person you are, because I sure as hell am proud of who I am and the things I’ve overcome to get to where I am in my life today. TC mark

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