6 Reasons Cat-Calling Women Will Not Get Them To Sleep With You

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It’s a male phenomenon I never quite understood. What exactly is the point of yelling to a woman as you drive by in your car? You aren’t trying to take her home considering you zoom past, and you couldn’t possible think that you made her day by screaming “Dat ass” out of your car window.

Yes, I know my ass looks fantastic in these leggings, but I did not wear them for your pleasure. If I were trying to please you my clothes would be off, and you would be in my bed, not your shitty car. So I do not need your reassurance that I look good as I’m walking by, and neither does any other woman.

The shit that leaves your mouth and travels to a woman’s back as you drive by says a lot about the type of man, or rather boy, you really are.

1. You’re probably sexist and the type of boy who often jokes about rape or how a woman’s place is in the kitchen. No. Actually, you can make me a sandwich. Extra bacon.

2. You have little respect for women although you still live with your mother.

3. You may just have extremely low self-esteem and the only time you can approach an attractive woman is behind your windshield.

4. You’re smart enough to know that usually you will be able to elicit a negative response from a catcall, but you lack a real sense of humor, so you find catcalls amusing.

5. Your intelligence level is far less than average and you actually believed a woman would enjoy hearing that she is a “dirty slut” out of the window of a pickup truck. Save it. Take me to dinner, then you can call me whatever you’d like from the back of that pickup truck.

6. The only time your wife isn’t up your ass is when you’re driving in your car, and the kid is only two, so she doesn’t know what you’re saying anyway.

I once bitched at one of my guy friends about a car beeping at me, and his response was “Well, look at what you’re wearing.” Oh. Men don’t even beep or yell at prostitutes and look at what they’re wearing! Yet I should have suspected that my tank top and shorts would cause a man to lose all control and honk his horn uncontrollably.

Catcalls are a sign of weakness. If you are a man, then talk to a woman respectfully face-to-face. The only time you should be talking to a woman through a window is if you’re taking her order at McDonald’s.