1. What they’re wearing. One side effect of pre-first-date-jitters is temporary amnesia regarding everything you learned about getting yourself dressed in the morning. There is only one train of thought and it is this: impress this person by any means. You just shouldn’t hold people accountable for a lapse in judgment on choice of attire.
2. Gaps in conversation. It’s like people would rather talk about their hernias than have a few seconds of silence while eating. Plus, most people find speaking while chewing to be rude, so it’s a lose-lose situation. Seriously though, you’re just getting to know each other. You’re just starting to feel this new person out. You sometimes can’t gauge how well you’ll jive in the future based on only a conversation or two. Plus, as aforementioned, you’re under circumstances that otherwise require you to feel the need to be charming and delightful but mysterious and sexy so cut people a break. They’re trying to juggle a lot of different balls. I have made too many sexual puns in this paragraph.
3. If you don’t immediately get the sense that you are falling in love. Isn’t that how it goes? You come back from the date and you are asked how it went and you’re expected to respond with either does August work for the engagement party? or I’m just not that into it. It’s like there can be no in between, like we just have to innately and immediately know. The whole love at first sight thing probably has more to do with chemical and hormonal reactions that make you feel one way or another toward someone. Because after that, as mostly everyone can attest to, those feelings come and go, but love does not, because love is built and it is a choice. So give it a chance to grow.
4. How much you are actually enjoying the restaurant, food or whatever it is you choose to do. Don’t judge the person based on where they take you. Just because you’re not enjoying what you’re doing doesn’t say anything about how much you’ll enjoy the person, so disassociate the two things.
5. If your date mentions they like something you’d consider “lowbrow.” It’s not necessarily mutually exclusive with intelligence. How simply can I put it other than we all have our own tastes, some weirder than others. Chances are, we’re aware that said tastes aren’t what would be considered universally liked and we’re aware of that– but we’re being open and honest with you anyway, because we want you to know who we really are.