30 Things You Should Stop Giving Your Energy To If You Really Want To Move On And Be Better

Noah Kalina

1. Trying to earn the approval of people who have no intention of loving you.

2. Trying to open the minds of people who have no intention of growing.

3. Trying to fulfill the expectations of your younger self. Everyone imagines their lives will look like movie clips when they’re older – forgive yourself and embrace what’s here now.

4. Anything you do that lets you avoid a feeling you don’t want to feel. Those coping mechanisms are the real problems in your life, and you will battle them forever until you unearth their root.

5. Imagining the intricacies of what could potentially go wrong with your life more than you do the number of ways everything could go right.

6. Focusing on your failures because you think if you shame yourself enough for them, you’ll change.


7. Trusting that the world won’t hurt you more than you focus on building the self-confidence to know you will persevere if it does.

8. Ruminating on past conflicts and how you should have approached them differently.

9. Everything that other people are doing wrong with their lives, as though you could ever have enough knowledge to make assessments like that.

10. Mindlessly scrolling as a pastime.

11. Spending time with people you don’t genuinely like because you’re afraid of spending time alone.

12. Staying in the wrong relationships because you’re afraid to leave.

13. Not committing to the right relationships because you’re afraid of missing out on something.

14. Wasting the precious minutes and hours of your life trying to numb the feelings that are uncomfortable as opposed to embracing them and letting them show you the ways in which you want and need to change.

15. Holding tightly to outdated opinions of others. People change. Let them show you who they are, and believe them when they do.

16. Worrying that you won’t make it more than you spend time strategizing how you will.

17. Trying to make everything look perfect as opposed to trying to build a life that feels the way you really want it to.

18. Bitterness over what other people did or didn’t do to you. Focus less on whether or not they deserve your pardon (they don’t) and more on whether you deserve to live without the burden of their mistakes (you do).

19. Wondering why you didn’t get something you wanted more than you consider what you were being shielded from that you couldn’t see at the time.

20. Thinking that you always know what’s best.

21. Being adverse to change.

22. Gossiping as a means of socializing. If you have nothing better to talk about, you need to spend time with better people.

23. Worrying more about whether or not you’ve “made it” than you do whether your daily habits will make you into the person you want to be for the next 6 decades.

24. Being too proud to resolve conflicts.

25. Being too proud to let someone else be right.

26. Being more committed to being “successful” than you are to being happy and kind.

27. Being more committed to building someone else’s dream than you are your own.

28. Believing you have to respond to everything that bothers you.

29. Refusing to acknowledge just how far you’ve already come (it will propel you to keep going).

30. Forgetting that the future can be better than the present – but that you are the only person who can make it so. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

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