1. They help you decipher reality through intricately theorized empirical evidence you jointly gather from Facebook and Twitter. Oh, the person you like tweeted that they are tired today? Yeah they’re tired. Of missing you. Not to mention you talk about the same things re: your crush/ex/whatever and somehow it always seems like fresh, original conversation.
2. You (platonically) sleep in the same bed and even cuddle and don’t think anything of it.
3. You give each other all of the really extremely intimate details of your personal lives and nobody cringes or says they don’t want to know about that… you just nod and continue to analyze. And then ask the pressing questions no one else will.
4. They know all of your passwords and you can essentially combine your social media outlets to create power houses for creeping. Just another little perk of having someone who trusts you to an unsafe and irrational degree in your everyday life.
5. Friends have a unspoken code of like hand signals or whatever… best friends do not. All it takes is an exchange of a glance and when you’re finally leaving or alone you start saying I knew what you were thinking, I knew what you were thinking… OH MY GOD YES THAT’S EXACTLY WHAT I WAS THINKING.
6. They’re so brutally honest with you that if anybody else said half the shit they do you’d have a field day. Your best friend says it? You’re like, lol, I knowwww.
7. They consider “bitch” and other words along those lines terms of endearment.
8. You don’t have to tell people you date that you come as a package deal. They know. And if they don’t, they will when they’re laying next to you the next morning while you’re on the phone with said best friend telling them everything that happened last night.
9. Speaking of, you literally have to call and tell them every little, pointless, dumb thing that happens in your day because somehow when you’re together everything means something and for some reason, they really do care who you were sitting with at lunch and what offhand comment they made about the girl in your English class. Essentially, you talk about basically nothing all day and yet it’s always fascinating conversation.
10. You magically start to hate all the same people.
11. You have code names for people and things but the problem is that they’re so clearly code names it’s not subtle at all and when your conversations are so infused with them you actually sound nuts.
12. You’re needy as hell and they love it. You can yell PAY ATTENTION TO ME and they actually will.
13. You share things that are like… really weird and should absolutely not be shared. Like thongs and razors and drinks even though one of you is sick.
14. Nudity is the norm.
15. You are comfortable telling them such ridiculous shit that you have to preface every other sentence with “okay don’t judge me but” and “okay just hear me out” until they finally crack and tell you they actually don’t care and you can just stop saying that.
16. You can leave them like 20 psychotic text messages in succession and you know they’ll understand it’s just a gesture of your love for them.