1. No two journeys are the same. You can get ideas and inspiration from the paths and stories of other people, but in the end, you have to carve your own way through these years. Nobody has been in your shoes, so nobody really knows what’s best for you.
2. There’s nothing wrong with settling down. The lists never include ideas on monogamy, commitment or reproduction. It’s as though even wanting these things so young has become a taboo. Hearing of someone getting married young is no longer accompanied by sighs of congratulations, it’s met with disdain and pity for the people who could have had so much ahead of them.
3. There’s no right or wrong way to be– people just want to open your eyes to the possibilities, and there’s nothing wrong with that. These lists aren’t usually intended to instruct us on our every decision, and they shouldn’t. However, something that shouldn’t be entirely written off is the fact that maybe someone has something to offer that you haven’t previously considered.
4. Most people who write those lists are talking to themselves, and are hoping you can get something from it. That’s been my experience, at least.
5. The reason the 20s have become such a period of interest is because they are filled with opportunity but also great confusion. Nobody wants to miss out on what they have the chance to do while they’re young, but at the same time, nobody wants to be told that what they’ve chosen isn’t ideal either. It’s because this is the first period in our lives where we don’t have a rule book. It’s the first time nobody is telling us exactly what to do and where to go, and sometimes, we still want a little bit of that for the sake of comfort.
6. Nobody really has the answers. What you should and shouldn’t do in your 20s is only ever what you do and do not want to. As I said, there is no right or wrong way to be right now, all you are responsible for is following your own journey and being true to where you know you need to be.
7. We’re all just looking for someone to affirm that the way we live is the way it’s supposed to be. And we may never grow out of this need.