1. You can’t be happy for others without comparing
Comparison to others is one of those things that people touch on a lot, but it must be stated that it takes plenty of mental work and self-introspection to overcome. For many of us, our ultimate goal is to find happiness and contentment with where we are in our lives.
Some of us begin our journey to this place, but find along the way, we can’t help but feel like we aren’t enough compared to others. However, the key to self-contentment is understanding that we can only control what happens in our own world. We will exhaust ourselves and become miserable watching other people’s lives and comparing it to our own. Not to mention it is the ultimate time waster. If we were created to live the lives of our friends, our coworkers, or our family members, we would be living their lives. But we’re not. To be content, we need to focus on ourselves and work on being the best versions of who we are.
2. You wake up feeling like your life is meaningless
Everyone deserves to wake up feeling like they have something to look forward to. However, if you wake up and constantly feel like it’s just another day and you’re merely existing rather than living, it’s time to rediscover what really makes you feel alive.
Your purpose for living and what drives you doesn’t have to be grandiose. Maybe it’s finding a job where you’re surrounded by people you like and can mentor every now and then, or taking classes, getting your license, or even signing up for a gym membership.
The purpose of life is to enjoy and be your best self with the time you have here on earth. Do whatever you can to find things that make you happy and fulfill your dreams.
3. You depend on people to make you happy
While maintaining a healthy social life is totally normal and has many benefits, we can’t expect our friends and loved ones to make us happy. If you find that you’re often feeling let down by your friends because they are unavailable or you feel like they aren’t meeting your needs as a friend, maybe it’s time to reevaluate the friendship and the role these friends play in your life or how you’re perceiving happiness and friendships.
Even if you do find the right set of friends, it’s always best to know that no one is responsible for your happiness. Everyone has their own life to live and true contentment comes from knowing that even if you are alone for a season, you will become accustomed to being happy in your own company. At the end of the day, you can always depend on you.
4. You do more talking about your goals than working to actually accomplish them
Like many, I’m definitely guilty of this. We have many elaborate dreams and goals for what we want to do with our lives and we’ll tell anyone who’ll listen. “I’m going to write a book one day,” or “I’m going to start my business.” We can talk about what we dream about doing until the day we die, but we won’t see the rewards of our dreams until we decide to go after them.
There are many limitations that may get in the way of us going after what we want. Fear, lack of resources, procrastination, and inexperience are just a few reasons why many of us stall on our goals. However, nothing is worse than living with the regret that we didn’t take a chance and just do it. Nothing will ever be perfect, but there are rewards on the other side of action.
5. You are pessimistic even when things are going great
Many feel the need to sabotage their own happiness. Perhaps because life comes with unpleasant circumstances sometimes, we expect the worst and believe that doomsday is near, even when we are showered with blessings. Life comes with its ups and downs, but the ups are meant to be enjoyed. So if things are going amazing, give thanks and enjoy it.
6. Your surroundings are negatively affecting your energy
It’s amazing how our surroundings can affect our mood. If you find that you’re becoming irritated easily, feel uninspired or you’re just tired of seeing the same scenery every single day, try switching up your atmosphere. Instead of being at home all the time, go to a cafe once in a while, take a stroll through nature, or go to a museum. Do anything that takes you away from your ordinary. If you are constantly exposed to the same setting all the time, especially if you are not taking time to connect with nature, it can negatively affect your mood.
7. You blame life experiences or others for your unhappiness
There will be people who will disappoint you and circumstances that will leave you wondering how you will move on and pick up the pieces. It hurts, and sometimes you want answers to why you’ve experienced so many negative circumstances and why so many people have left you when you needed them most.
But I think there’s a blessing in attaining your own sense of happiness within yourself by releasing control from people and events to make you happy.
This isn’t easy to do because we live in a world that is built on distractions that help us deal with being unhappy. It won’t happen overnight and will take conscious effort to find peace within. However, we are the source of our own happiness and if we can learn to control the sources of our happiness, we’ll always find a way to be content in life.