Right now, the clearness of the blue sky and the clean air whiffing past your nose on a summer night isn’t beautiful.
The birds awakening to fly across the crown of your head as you walk to school or work isn’t beautiful.
A kiss, a touch, a warm meal, being skin to skin with your love, isn’t beautiful. You can’t even see, feel or comprehend life at this moment because my love, you aren’t living, you are surviving as a victim who has succumbed to darkness and for now, that is OK.
You are at the very least, surviving. But I promise you, life will one day be beautiful again.
You will rise in the morning free of the heaviness of last night’s burdens and you won’t lament facing yet another day where you are forced to merely ‘survive.’
You won’t resentfully look at passersby, who even though strangers, seem to be living a life in paradise because they have not known the ruins you have. You will no longer envy their laughs, their nonchalant hellos, the very breaths they take. You will no longer wish desperately that you could be them and that depression would lift so you can join everyone else. Life isn’t beautiful right now, because the quotes, the videos, all the doses of inspiration that people have sent your way seem like lies. This pain, this hurt, this feeling of being on the edge of the world with no choice but to jump, is what they call life, and I know you no longer want any part of it.
But I promise you, life will be beautiful again.
It won’t be perfect, but you will smile, laugh, love, and believe in miracles. Trust me, I was where you were over and over again, but today, I see the beauty in this concept of life that others have tried to sell to you and I beg you to take it and not return it, because life CAN be beautiful when you make it to the other side of this pain.
You just need to hold on, survive, and be strong in a time that is only temporary, because as the saying goes, ‘it can’t rain forever.’
So I don’t know how you feel today, what you see today in this life, in this world full of broken promises.
But if there is one thing I can promise you, life will again be beautiful, because pain isn’t permanent. Hurt isn’t a life sentence and though you feel cursed and you yell at the heavens to give you mercy, you will breathe again and gain the reward of becoming a better person through all of this.
I can’t tell you why life sometimes gives us burdens too heavy, but I also don’t understand why we make it in times we thought we would sink.
So think about this today, as you toil and ponder in your pain.
Life right now isn’t beautiful, but I promise you if you hold on like I did, it will be once again.