15 Ways To Cope When You’re Going Through A 20-Something Life Crisis

Hopeful woman looking to the side in a hat backlit by the sun
Chad Madden / Unsplash

FYI: I am stressed and irritated AF.

I just turned 23 two days ago and I am already over life and its bullshit.

The older you get, the more you are conscious of the fact that your life is nowhere where you thought it would be and everything that has gone wrong seems to become more magnified.

You zoom in on the fact that you aren’t working and are still living at home with parents who are annoying.

You realize that you have challenges that make things 10 times harder for you to get to where you want to be and suddenly you are a little overwhelmed. Essentially, you begin to question EVERYTHING.

I know for me, I struggle with anxiety and depression and on days like these, I loathe that it is a part of my story. I feel like it has made my life a million times more difficult and that much more complicated. Not to mention the stigma that comes with mental health struggles in general. That being said, as millennials, a lot of us are struggling greatly, even if we fail to show it on our social media pages. We all have our own stories, but it is safe to say we are all going through a bit of a life crisis’.

Here are 15 ways to deal when you struggling through a life crisis.

1. Try not making a big deal out of little things that can be fixed.

Do not cave into the belief that things have to be done within a certain time period, such as driving, or living on your own, etc.

Don’t beat yourself up over things that are fixable when there are a lot of things in our lives that are much more difficult to control.

2. Pray, meditate or do anything that brings you solace.

I don’t practice religion regularly, but I do believe in actively looking for someone to put your faith in when times get hard. Take a moment and ask God or whoever you look to for strength and guidance in your life. You need that when things seem overwhelming.

3. Remember that you are an extremely strong person.

I may be sensitive, but no one can look me in the eye and tell me I am weak if they truly knew my story. Whether you have shared what you have gone through or not, everyone goes through things that have made them a stronger person for it. If you have survived some tough shit you never thought you would survive, you are winning.

4. Allow yourself some time to just chill.

Sometimes you just need to sleep, go to the gym or talk to a friend for solace and not think about life. Go out for dinner if you have the means and just take a break from the stresses of life. You need that time to unwind.

5. Do not make mountains out of molehills.

People will yell at you for no reason, things will go wrong, your parents will piss you off and you won’t be able to afford that dress for your friend’s party.

Things will go wrong in life and it will be an annoyance but do not let that steal your joy. You deserve to preserve your peace and happiness.

6. Surround yourself with the right people.

Whether they are my friends or even family, I will limit my time and communication with you if I deem you as a negative person because I need to preserve my peace and happiness.

Especially when you struggle with things like depression, I caution you to be very wary of who gets your time and energy because some people are negative and may trigger your illness further. If they are getting you down then you need to distance yourself. You also do not need an explanation.

7. Revel in small goals.

I am late AF I know, LOL, but I am studying to get my license and I am stoked! I won’t be depressed that I am 23 and I don’t drive because to me that is something very minute that is attainable if I put my mind to it. When you make little steps to fix your life for the better, you are getting to where you want to be.

8. Remember where you are coming from.

A year ago I was suicidal and didn’t imagine I would live to be seeing this day right now. I still get overwhelmed almost every day because mental health struggles are isolating and stressful, but I’ve come an extremely long way.

I have to constantly remember that when I want to get down on myself for any reason.

9. Whatever you have been through or are going through is meant to make you stronger.

I am such a sensitive person it’s not funny, but no one can tell me I am weak with all of the struggles I have endured thus far. I hate that I take anti-depressants and I hate living with depression. I loathe it. I do.

But I am a stronger person for everything I have endured and I have a more mature perspective on life and challenges that most 23-year-olds.

We are a very self-centered generation who fusses over things that aren’t important: Our social media following, how we are perceived by others and how much we are slaying.

These things essentially do not matter at the end of the day. What matters is that you are a survivor of so many challenges that were meant to break you but didn’t.

10. Stop worrying about what people think of you.

What you have gone through and what people think of you, as a result, is not important.

Everyone’s a little fucked up at the end of the day anyway but we are very quick to point the finger at others when we have our own issues in life.

It’s time to stop worrying about others and start building on your life.

People are people and they will always have things to say.

11. Enjoy every moment that you are smiling.

People go through a lot in their everyday lives, even though social media doesn’t show it. People are angry, people are unsatisfied, people are bitter and people are hurting. Every moment that you find an ounce of joy is a blessing.

When your boyfriend tells you he loves you that is a blessing. When you are broke AF but could afford to treat yourself on your birthday, that is a blessing. When you hug your friend you haven’t seen forever, that is a blessing. Life isn’t easy but bask in the moments where you actually get to smile.


Let me just say this, it is hard to love yourself when you have been through a lot, but how you feel about yourself, how you speak to yourself shows on the outside. I need to work on this for sure. Because depression can tell you a lot of lies and feed you negativity.

Love yourself because that is not society’s job to do so. Tell yourself you are sexy AF and visualize the person you aspire to be. People are already wrapped up in trying to have their own confidence, don’t wait for them to build yours.

12. Pray and hope for better.

I am not actively religious because I am on the fence when it comes to God at times because I have hurt much in my little young life. But we have to lean on something to give us solace in a world full of hurt. Pray, meditate, do whatever is you gotta do to stay sane.

13. Be thankful for real friends.

We ain’t 16 no more and good friends who are with you through thick and thin are hard to come by in your twenties so you better you grab hold to the ones who have been your day ones. Real friends have seen you at your worst and at your come up and are still there. Cherish them.

14. Remember every twenty-something is freaking out.

It may seem as though your friends know what they are doing, but they don’t. My life is a mess and I know that, (God help me) but I know I am not the only one. Do not assume what you see on social media is facts. We are literally all out here grinding and struggling for our dream lives and dream jobs. Like can I graduate already???

15. You have a purpose.

Start feeding yourself the idea that regardless of what you have been through, you are smart, beautiful, talented and a person who is meant to shine and will get better.

I do not believe we are here on this earth to just struggle. You are here for a reason beyond what you have gone through. I know for me, I’m extremely insightful (takes a moment to brag) and I love to write and speak.

Hopefully, God uses that for good. I have hurt much, struggled much, doubted much, but I’m here. There’s gotta be better out there for me. Hold onto those promises as a means to get through this crazy thing called life. It’s tough. We are all dealt cards we can’t deal at times and we struggle, we falter and we fail. But hold your head up, please.

Use your experiences to transform you into the person you were meant to be. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

God first. Friend. Encourager.

Keep up with Bria on Instagram, Twitter and briasbarrows.wixsite.com

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