I’m A 23-Year-Old Virgin And I’m Staying That Way Until I Find Someone Worthy

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Samantha Gades / Unsplash

So I’m about to be 23 and I’m still a virgin.

I know some of my readers are like girl what? Because in this day and age, most of us have already gotten our cookies cracked ( like my cute little metaphor?) or have at least had some good ole oral sex.

But I am a virgin virgin and I have decided it will stay that way until God tells me I am ready and declares the one who I will have that amazing experience with.

No, I am not a virgin by choice, even though my whiny younger self would say so and innocently declare, I am saving myself for marriage).

Bullshit, but I digress. 

I am a virgin because I want God to tell me who is worthy of having my body.

I don’t look down on anybody who has sexual experiences out of sheer will to because that’s their choice and it’s not my place to judge. Besides, sex is lit okay!

As a virgin, it’s hard af to keep these urges under control considering the body was made for sex.

But I have always lived by this and it won’t change. No man, I don’t care who he is, is worthy of your body unless you know that is what you want for sure. Your body is precious and honestly, I am glad I am still a virgin.

Let me tell you why. 

I used to be so embarrassed to admit I was virgin because it seemed I was a late bloomer for everything, but as I grow and mature through life and tackle some hard experiences, I value my body as something that was created by God and literally it is my space, my territory.

There are a lot of things we don’t get to call our own in this world, but our body isn’t one of them.

Whoever gets the luxury of experiencing that moment with me needs to love me. Plain and simple.

And he needs to want to connect with me on a deeper level besides just sexually. Even if this just means oral sex.

I view sexual activity as both a spiritual and intimate experience that involves two people who love and accept one another and I don’t view it as fair for someone to get the luxury of being pleasured at my expense if it is not for the right reasons.

I don’t want to be viewed as merely a moment, and I will openly say this to any man who declares his love to me. That’s great, but I come first.

Ladies, you come first. I don’t care how sexy your boyfriend is right now and how much he tells you he loves you, if you feel you aren’t sexually ready, don’t give in to something just because you want to please someone or because you think you have to. Like what?

Your body is yours and you make the choice of who has that right to experience you sexually.

If homeboy can’t wait, then I truly believe his intentions are not pure.

Someone who has your best interest at heart will look into your eyes and tell you not to do anything you are not comfortable with.

That is someone who is looking out for your best interest.

Being sexually liberated is great, but you can also be liberated by choosing what you are comfortable with.

There is also no shame in being a virgin in your late or early twenties.

People will often shame you for this and label you as a prude, but honestly, what someone does sexually is no one else’s business but theirs.

It is a very private and personal matter that is individual to a person and what they choose to do and everyone’s life is different.

So if you are still a virgin, I want you to see it as something beautiful and amazing and own that part of you. Your time will come and God will determine when and who that time will be with. You are not less of a woman or less sexy because you are a virgin as well.

Do not let society or even yourself dictate how you live your life.

I truly believe that some things are the way they are for a reason and this has been your portion for a very special reason. So please hold onto that and carry on. You are awesome, you are original, you are you. TC mark

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