Technology may have revolutionised dating, but the fundamental faux pas remain. When it comes to these timeless faux pas, no show is a match for Seinfeld in its comical and exaggerated look at the minutia of dating pitfalls, and the neuroses that go along with them. In turn, no character matches George Costanza for being the king of the county in that regard — or lord of the idiots, if you want to get more Seinfeld quote mileage out of this post.
As such, Seinfeld has the ability to be relevant today, a fact to which the popularity of the Modern Seinfeld Twitter feed attests. In other words, it is still true that there is a Seinfeld reference suitable for almost every social situation. Tinder is no exception.
For the uninitiated, Tinder is the dating app where users are presented with pictures of available men and women in their area. All the user has to do is swipe left if they’re not interested and swipe right if they are. If both users swipe right, they’re free to flirt away.
I’ve been swiping every which way on Tinder, on and off for the last few months. I constantly encounter what I consider Tinder faux pas, and George Costanza is the man that I end up thinking about. This is not exactly the desired result.
Guys, when it comes to Tinder, perhaps it is wise to do the opposite of what George would do. After all, when he tried the opposite of what he’d normally do, he got a job at the New York Yankees and the girl. Think about it. And heed this advice.
NOTE: I am aware that many women on Tinder – myself included – are by no means perfect. In fact, we can certainly look to Elaine Benes to figure out what not to do in the urban dating jungle. However, that’s a subject for an entirely different post…
1. Don’t use pictures of hot women to attract other women
Surprisingly, a lot of men choose to feature pictures of themselves posing with a hot woman in a way that suggests they are part of couple, or surrounded by a bevy of hot women. This suggests a couple things to me, neither of which will make me swipe right.
a). One of these women could be your girlfriend. And I’m not interested in men who cheat.
b). One of these women could be your ex-girlfriend, or they could be friends or even randoms, and you’re using their picture to let potential dates know how desirable you are. This is where George Costanza’s flawed logic comes in. You will recall the episode where George carries around a picture of the beautiful woman Jerry’s dating in order to attract other women. His reasoning? ‘It’s like I’ve already been with one of her own! My hand’s been stamped! I come and go as I please!’
Basically, if you have beautiful women draped over you in your profile pictures, I will constantly be thinking that I may be dating a man with a mind that works like George Costanza. Shudder.
2. Don’t use wedding photos to attract women
This Tinder ‘don’t’ should be obvious, but – again — it’s surprisingly common. A simple reason for using your wedding photo could be that you’re divorced or separated, and you innocently think that you looked your best in your wedding suit.
However, it says to me and lots of other women (according to discussions I’ve had with my single girlfriends) that you may still be married or, in an extension of the first Tinder ‘don’t’, you’re doing a George Costanza and testing the theory that women will hit on you when you’re wearing a wedding ring. And we all know that that experiment fell flat for George.
3. Don’t lie
Saying you’re an architect called Art Vandelay or a marine biologist might be fun when you’re chatting, but it will be embarrassing when you have to admit you lied when you’re on date three.
4. Don’t be persistent after you’ve been shut down
George’s post break up badgering forces one of his dates to blurt out, ‘Alright George, it’s you!’ On Tinder, some men will continue to message (and message and message), demanding to know why the chatting stopped. Worse, they won’t accept the diplomatic reason that’s been provided.
If you’re one of these men, know that this will probably get you blocked, and you’ll be remembered in that woman’s mind as, ‘The guy who wouldn’t leave me alone on Tinder’. You’re likely to wind up being a cautionary tale used by women when they advise a single girlfriend about the pros and cons of Tinder. And no one wants to be a cautionary tale. Or George Costanza, for that matter.