6 “Compliments” Girls Give When They Hate Someone

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1. “Her style is just so unique.

Unique is bad. If someone was truly “unique” fashion-wise, and really pulling off, you would say “flawless” or just “YAAAAAAS BITCH SLAY.” Unique is something you tell the fourth grader whose science project was a purple paper mache volcano that didn’t have enough baking soda in it. It just means “she was clearly going for something, even if no one can tell what that something was.” And it’s coded as a good-enough adjective, so you can freely say it about someone without coming across like a bitch. But you don’t say a girl’s style is “unique” unless you hate her.

2. “He’s so good for her.”

AKA this girl was a hot mess until she got a man in her life who a) had a little bit of money or who b) kept her from being the last girl on the dance floor at last call on a Tuesday. A woman may be good for a man — and she often is, she’ll help him with the basics such as “washing jeans occasionally” and “remembering to feed himself at least one vegetable a day” — but if a man is good for a woman, you can bet that woman is kinda sloppy.

3. “He’s really nice.”

Ooh, I’m sorry, but if a girl is saying you’re nice, that means she is not interested in the D and never will be. You come off as weak/boring/needy, or some combination of all three, and she may use you for some free trips to the restaurants she’s been waiting to try, but if she sleeps with you once, it’s gonna be out of pity. Your relationship life cycle will be: wine and dine a girl you really like, watch her go off with the guy who works half as hard and gets twice at far at work, and complain about her on the internet. 🙁

4. “She looks really good in that picture.”

But she looks busted in real life. She has the Instagram angle/filter combo down to a science because she has to, and everyone is living the lie with her on social media. Honestly, let her have it.

5. “She really puts in so much effort.”

Ok so the brutal truth is that you don’t have to put in that much effort if you’re really good at whatever it is, and even you do, the trick is that people shouldn’t be able to tell. If you’re calling out the effort someone is putting in, like “Ooh, she works so hard tho,” you’re just pointing out the fact that they have to try. It doesn’t come naturally to them.

6. “I love that she’s just so comfortable with her body.”

Mmmmmmmmmmhmmmmmmmm.

image – Mean Girls