The thing about depression and anxiety is that it never is about not having friends or family. It isn’t about not being able to eat three times a day. It isn’t about not being able to buy the stuff that you want. It isn’t about not being to do stuff like travel, too. It’s about feeling lonely even when you’re surrounded by a huge crowd of your closest friends. It’s about feeling of never being enough even if you’re doing everything you can. It’s about always feeling wrong even if you are doing what is right. It’s about being able to experience lots of cool stuff, but still feel empty all the same.
The thing about depression and anxiety is that maybe just maybe you just want someone to understand. Understand that you’re not perfect. Understand that yes, you have bad days and good days. Some more than others. Understand that some days you just feel alive and want to do everything. Understand that sometimes you just want to lay down and do nothing. Understand that sometimes you just need a hug. Or a hot milk. Or a cookie. Or both.
The thing about depression and anxiety is that it never ever truly leaves you. It never stops. It may disappear for a while, but may appear at the most unexpected moment and yes, it will hurt. It will hurt so much. It is like darkness growing inside you seeping through your veins that you’ll never escape. You’ll just have learn to live with it.
The thing about depression and anxiety is that it exists. It is real. It is happening. It is not some excuse to escape reality. It is not being a coward.
The thing about depression and anxiety is that it actually is being brave. Being brave, because despite all the darkness within- we still choose to go on. We still choose to smile and laugh and experience crazy things like going on a road trip with friends at 2AM and walking from your house to a fast food restaurant at midnight just because you were hungry.
The thing about depression and/or anxiety is that I think I may have it.