The 3 Things You Absolutely Must Allow Yourself To Do In Life

via IHerok
via IHerok
There are certain things in life that are difficult to do. There are things that arise within our daily routines, within our yearly experiences, that we would rather run from that embrace. There are things that hurt us, that fill us with fear, there are things that have hardwired us to think negatively about our capacity to overcome, but at the end of the day we must, we absolutely must, do them.

We must move on.

Moving on is a difficult thing that plagues both the heart and mind. As human beings we tend to favor familiarity, we tend to grip towards our pasts because they are all we have known. We grip to the limbs, to the lips, to the minds, of those who have loved and hurt us, because within them we have built homes.

“We overthink, we make excuses, we have one foot in the door, and we run. We leap. We sprint. However, there is no accomplishment in that.”

We must move on from that. We must understand that there is something beautiful waiting for us on the other side of it all. We must cry, we must mourn, we must make the mistake of going back until we are weary and cannot revert any more. Within that, we must rise. We must believe with a ruthless fury that there is more for our hearts, there is more for our love.

We must make time.

It becomes clear over time just how important it is to cut into our days little pockets of stillness. It is even more important to dedicate those moments to the hobbies that our souls crave. I understand that everyone is busy trying to make their lives worth something, I understand that working two jobs is difficult, that going to school for 14 hours straight is taxing – but you must make time for that which makes your heart sing.

Make time to paint, make time to bicycle through a new part of your city, make time to write, to explore, to have your mind blown. I promise that you have it, I promise that you can find an extra 15 minutes in your routine to breathe life into your passions, for time is man made, and you must make it for yourself.

We must love.

Loving other human beings is something that our bodies and our souls desire on our deepest levels, but when we allow for our minds to dictate our sentiment things get intimidating. We overthink, we make excuses, we have one foot in the door, and we run. We leap. We sprint. However, there is no accomplishment in that. It is extremely tough to hold a heart in your hands, and it is equally as tough to allow for the palms of someone else to hold yours within theirs, but it must be done. To love despite flaws, despite fear, despite vulnerability, is to dive into the bravest, most gratifying parts of life, and we simply must trust that.

Remember that there is courage to be found even in the weakest points of our lives. When we are feeling beat down and just want to sleep the day away, there is courage in making time to push colours around on a canvas. When we are heartbroken, and mourning the loss of his hands, her scent, the way the future was spoken about with such belief, there is courage to be found in loving ourselves, in loving the idea of trying again, and in loving the process. For it is the way in which we open ourselves up to the world that ends up being the most rewarding aspect of our lives, and by doing the things that we fear most, we create for ourselves a world of opportunity. TC mark

Read more of Bianca Sparacino’s writing in her new book Seeds Planted in Concrete here.


Trace the scars life has left you. It will remind you that at one point, you fought for something. You believed.

“You are the only person who gets to decide if you are happy or not—do not put your happiness into the hands of other people. Do not make it contingent on their acceptance of you or their feelings for you. At the end of the day, it doesn’t matter if someone dislikes you or if someone doesn’t want to be with you. All that matters is that you are happy with the person you are becoming. All that matters is that you like yourself, that you are proud of what you are putting out into the world. You are in charge of your joy, of your worth. You get to be your own validation. Please don’t ever forget that.” — Bianca Sparacino

Excerpted from The Strength In Our Scars by Bianca Sparacino.

Read Here

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