This Is How It Feels To Love Someone With Anxiety

Vladimir Kudinov
Vladimir Kudinov

People have issues. There is no other way to say it. I know this because I have been fighting with depression for the last six years. I still do it every single night. People fight against their inner demons, which could be anything. Anyone. Just like the flu, anyone can experience anxiety issues. I can’t contemplate and say whether it’s a good or a bad thing. It is just something that you learn to live with.

You try to act normal and keep your cool every time you are with someone who is experiencing a deeply rooted problem like anxiety. When it comes to love, you always walk an extra mile or meet your partner halfway. If you are dating someone who has anxiety issues, you need to walk more than just an extra mile. You don’t meet them halfway. You go all the way to the end of the tunnel. Nevertheless, it is one such thing that you can never regret. I have been in love with someone who has anxiety issues and I won’t have it any other way.

1. You won’t have an “ideal” relationship.

It won’t be like one of those relationships that you read about in YA books. You can’t compare it with anything else in the world. It is like falling in love with someone for the first time all over again. You would make an effort to know someone from deep within.

What makes them anxious? What cools them down? What is their go-to movie? What is their favorite cuisine? What is their safe place, their sanctuary? What is their story?

These are the kinds of questions you try to solve in the process of falling in love with them. You don’t try to become their soulmate or twin flame. You become their skin and bones.

2. There’s a lot of planning and less spontaneity.

Because the thought of leaving everything just like that and going for a romantic weekend getaway would be a nightmare for your partner. From having a movie night to going out for dinner, everything needs to planned (and re-checked). Mark all those crowded places off as well.

3. But you’ll share a different level of intimacy.

But that’s the thing. If you really love them and wants to have a great time with them, you won’t be bothered by their choices. Who would like to go to a concert or a movie theater when you can spend hours with your partner talking about The Big Bang and time-travel?

4. Your love won’t be enough at times.

There would always come a time when their anxiety would take over and you would find it hard to calm them down. They would be inconsolable and you would realize that even your love can’t be enough to make them feel like home. Give them enough time and space. That’s the best thing you can do. Just let them know that you will always be there for them. Always. Because it’s either all or nothing.

5. You have to make a constant effort.

Loving someone is not an event. It’s a process. Every single morning, you would fall in love with them in a whole new way (which would be an experience in itself). But it’s not as dreamy as it sounds. Every day, you need to make an effort to fall in love with them. You would discover something new about them and despite all the odds you would learn to see beyond the obvious.

6. But it’s so damn worth it.

Because they would never let you down. They would mean each and every word that would be spoken by them. They would make you believe that storms are mild and innocence in overrated. They would give their heart and soul (and everything in between) to you. They would love you in the most effortless way. You would feel it in your bones.

7. Your relationship is built on honesty and trust.

There is this thing about those who have anxiety issues. They are quite concerned about their future. They can’t let their loved ones down. For them, honesty and trust mean everything. They will let you experience a whole new definition of loyalty, which would bring a radical change in you.

8. It’s an unforgettable experience.

If you would sail through all the ups and downs, you’ll realize how effortlessly you have created a lasting relationship. Being with them might be a task in itself at times, but deep within you would realize that they are just like anyone else. They have their share of insecurities just like every one of us. We all are a little broken and flawed. At least they are true to themselves and are not afraid to show their flaws. This is what makes them so damn special!

No one would be able to see the dynamics involved in your relationship. Only the two of you would realize how far you have come. At the end of the day, loving someone with anxiety issues would be just like loving someone who is flawed and honest. And you know what? It’s okay! Aren’t we all a little flawed after all? Embrace their flaws and walk all the way down to the end of the tunnel.

Because they are so damn worth it. Thought Catalog Logo Mark

Bestselling author, part-time stargazer, full-time pizza lover. Writer at NewLoveTimes.

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