I’m feeling pretty businessy today. Yep. Think today is gonna be all about that business. I have put on a blazer and pulled up LinkedIn because today I am a proper, all in, business person. But you know what, this week I have also wanted to be a yoga teacher, zookeeper, videographer, magazine editor, girl band member, charity worker and the person responsible for getting ABBA back together (you don’t know that wasn’t me).
I think I also want to fuck off all of my possessions, go and live in a forest without shoes and live off the earth. But actually, I love the city and tequila. I think social media is bad for my mental health but memes are also bringing me joy for at least 14 hours out of the day.
Yesterday I dressed all in black because I wanted to look moody and cool. Today I’m feeling like bright yellow might be the one because I want to be super approachable.
What do you mean you “don’t get” me?
Okay, so I guess you could say that I’m inconsistent. I pick up new hobbies and drop them again before you’ve even had time to utter the word “crochet”. My attention span is comparable to that of a teaspoon unless I am VERY invested in the idea/concept/conversation/short story/specials board/reason my takeaway is delayed.
In the past, this has led to people not being able to “place me”. I have been accused of changing my mind like I change my clothes. It’s a fair assessment. I would suggest that the only really constant thing in my life is my sarcastic tone and serious case of resting bitch face.
I have never had a plan, or if I have, it has very quickly been replaced by a new one. I have never felt as though I have a set trajectory or one real ambition. I want for nothing and I also want for absolutely everything. Far from seeing my obvious lack of specific dream chasing as a flaw, I see it as a giving myself the opportunity to achieve anything.
Last year, I wrote an article about “finding yourself”. I guess this follows on from that theme. I know that for so many people out there, this lack of knowing what they want to do or who they want to be can be an incredibly challenging and often anxiety-inducing place to find yourself.
It needn’t be.
You are not required to be consistent. You can do whatever the hell you want. You like the look of that job/jumper/facial hair/political stance? Try it on for size.
So what if you change your job every year? So what if you move from one industry to another? So what if you want to be in the cast of Made in Chelsea and then the following day you idealize the trawlermen? Who’s telling you that’s wrong?
Do you think it demonstrates lack of commitment? Is that what you’ve been told?
Who the hell are you committing to wholeheartedly other than yourself?! This is YOUR life.
The world is exciting and ever-changing. You are ever changing. Your constant reinvention of yourself is not inconsistency or flakiness, it is adaptation. It is growth. It is strength.
Why have one life when you can have many? Variety, it’s the spice of life.
Anyway, back to business.