If you never feel that you are good enough for anyone or anything, I understand. I know that it is not sensitive if I say that you should not be because you do feel that you are and I cannot take that away from you. I get why you feel that way. I understand and you should know that your feelings are heard and validated. I am not going to say anything but I would just like to say some stuff for you to consider.
You never want to feel this way. Who wants to feel this way anyway? You want to be loved and accepted for the way you are. You want people to appreciate you, to respect, to love and to grow together with you. Unfortunately, things do not always go according to plan don’t they? Why? I cannot tell you why. To be honest, even for me, it is still a huge mystery. It is still a huge mystery that we often cannot appreciate one another. We often tear each other down to feel better about ourselves. We could say bad things about a stranger we just saw because he or she may seem to have the perfect life. We could say bad things about a stranger we just saw because he or she may seem to have the perfect life and that scares us. We are scared to see someone else living a better life than us. We are afraid that indicates our lives are miserable. But is it the truth?
You never feel good enough because you feel that you do not look a certain way. You feel that you have to appear the way that people want you to be, not the way you really are. You feel that beautiful is not something that is uniquely yours. It is not something that people can see inside of you, it is something you may or may not possess externally. When people decide that you do not represent their concept of beauty, they toss you away, don’t they? They say that you do not look that part. And the cruelest part? They say that you should not exist, at all. They say that the world is a better place if you just disappear. Why? It is all because you do not represent that concept of beauty that they held. And you took their words, you believe in them. You took them to heart and acknowledge it as truth. But darling, it is not the truth. It is so far from the truth.
Some people’s idea of beauty is so narrow and their thinking about what is good in life is too narrow. They could not enjoy a lot of things life gives them because they keep throwing them away because your beauty does not correlate with what they think. They think that beautiful is just about how the face and body should look like, something to appease their shallow judgment.
And instead of diving into your beauty, they run away because they are scared. They are scared of feeling defeated by you.
They are scared that they have to admit that they are wrong and you are right, you have been right all along. Your beauty cannot be judged by them, it cannot be defined by them, and that they do not own you. They do not own any part of you. They have no right to throw away your dignity, your pride, and your respect.
You, my dear, are far from shallow. You are the definition of epic and wonderful. You lit up the world. You lit up other people’s world. Your very existence is a beauty. It is a beauty that the world has never seen before. And we thank you for that. We thank you that in this world full of conformists, you are a rebel. You rebel against the injustice, the mediocrity, the “normal way of living”. In your own way, you stand up against them and show them what is meant to live a life according to your own rules, according to your own sense of self.
You show us the courage to believe in ourselves. To believe that we are worth it and that we are beautiful in our own ways. You show us the meaning of being human and that is to feel and to love. You feel and you love fiercely and shamelessly. You are not afraid to wear your heart on your sleeve. You purposely wear it on your sleeve. You care deeply about the world and the people around you. You want to make it a better place. You dream of making the world a place full of love and you know that it starts with you showing love and kindness towards those that you meet. Not a lot of people would say this but I admire you, I admire you very deeply.
And another truth that I want to mention to you is that those who reject you, who belittle you, are actually jealous of you. They are jealous that you have such a deep and profound understanding about the world and that you are wiser beyond the years. You live a life that they could not live. You live a life full of freedom, without being constrained by the standard of the society. You define the rules, not others. You define what you want to be in life. You define your own standards of happiness and success.
But all of these things might be impossible to acknowledge if you do not realise that they are holding you back from being who you really are. You might complain, “Don’t you understand how difficult it is to let go of those who have hurt me? Who have said and did all the mean things to me in the past or even at the moment? Do you know how hard it is to let go of my own negative self-talk telling me how worthless I am and that I should not exist?” And I can only answer, “Yes, I do. I understand completely what you feel and how hard it is to let go of it all.”
Why? Because a long time ago, I was you. It took me quite a while to let go of being insecure. But the day that we can let go of insecurity is the day when we say that, “It is enough.” It is enough for you to listen to those who say things to me without knowing me. It is enough letting them take control of your life. It is enough to let them fill a space of your head and your heart with negativity. This is your life. We only have one chance to live. We only have one life. How do you want to spend your life?
Spend your life by filling it with happiness, with joy, and with peace. Spend it by doing all the things that you want to do in your life. Open your eyes, mind, and your heart towards the beauty of this world. If you think you have seen or have known about everything, question it. Do not always conform to what the world told you. Have your own concept of beauty and even better, be your own concept of beauty. Accept and love yourself for who you are. Do not mind those who say you are not beautiful. Their words do not own you and you are not bind to be who they want you to be. Be you. Just be you. Because the best people in life are not perfect, none of us are really, they are just those who know that they are imperfectly perfect and they love themselves and each other nonetheless. Love yourself darling, you should, after all, you are one of the most beautiful things the universe has ever seen.