I want to call for some hard truth when it comes to labels and relationships. At the ripe age of 23, I’ve played both the victim, and the perpetrator when it comes to the whole half in half out, friend-lationship thing.
I’d be lying if I said it doesn’t drive me up the wall when I share physical and emotional closeness with a girl, only to have it swept under the rug until one of us wants to find it again.
I feel like it’s a lack of honesty. A cop out. A weirdly twisted way to say “If I don’t express my feelings towards you, then I don’t really have any at all”.
I don’t believe we’re meant to jump from person to person, but in the grand scheme of things it’s easier than just saying “Hey! I like you!” And then actually taking time to work at it, and see if there’s something real there.
Instead we hang out, talk, get close, but not too close. Pushing the boundaries of friendship(do you make out with all your friends?) to the absolute limit, but never quite over the edge into the “Hey you’re my girlfriend/boyfriend” territory.
I think we long for that close deep connection with one person, but fear holds us back. Fear of hurt, misunderstanding, vulnerability, taking a risk at gaining something permanent or losing it just the same.
Maybe this just sounds like the ramblings of an angsty 23 year old, but I don’t think I’m alone. Surely there’s more of you out there that want to snap out of this whole “I don’t care about anyone, but secretly I do” trend that is so popular with my generation today.
All I’m trying to say is, I think we need to take that first step. The first step of owning our actions, and being bold once again.
If the reward of being with that “one” is as beautiful as it is rare, I want to risk everything for just one shot at it.