Answers To My Rejected New York Times Crossword Puzzle Submission
By Ben Kassoy
Down
1. Fruit sometimes soggy
CANTALOUPE
2. Allowed to marry in New York
DWARFS
7. Honey, I Shrunk the _________
DEBTCEILING
11. Dark-horse Presidential candidate, 2012
RICKMORANIS
12. What I got
LOVIN’
14. What I also got
MILK
18. Famous female singer purported to have penis
RUPAUL
21. Cantaloupe, italicized
CANTALOUPE
23. Purchased at Cracker Barrel
ROCKINGCHAIR
25. Looney Tunes curse word
@$&!
30. Reason I missed your birthday party (lie)
FLATTIRE
32. Real reason I missed your birthday party
FANTASYFOOTBALLDRAFT
37. Not a fruit no matter what you say
TOMATO
41. Cantaloupe, wingdings
CANTALOUPE
43. I’m about to sneeze
WAITNEVERMIND
Across
1. The new black
PINKISHBLACK
4. The old black
COLORED
7. Most overplayed on the radio
COMMERCIALS
11. Suggestive text
;]
13. Capital of Nevada
LASVEGASDUHWAITWAITNOIT’S RENOWAITWAITASECONDCARSONCITYMAYBE?LETMETHINKYEAHTHAT’SRIGHTCARSONCITY
19. Excuse me, sir, do you have a minute for human rights?
NO
26. Orson “__________” Welles
FUCKING
33. “It’s so big and scary”
THAT’SWHATSHESAID
35. Made Thomas Edison famous
ANTISEMITISM
41. Your Social Security Number
486—WAITWAITWAITGOODTRYYOUALMOSTHADME
44. Cantaloupe, hangman board
__ __ __ __ __ __ __ __ __ __
46. 1939 Best Picture, Gone With ______ Wind
THE
47. Cantaloupe, binary
01100011 01100001 01101110 01110100 01100001 01101100 01101111 01110101 01110000 01100101